top 8 morons of 2003

[urso8up]

----- 1. WILL THE REAL DUMMY PLEASE STAND UP?
AT&T fired President John Walter after nine months, saying he
lacked intellectual leadership. He received a $26 million severance
package. Perhaps it's not Walter who's lacking intelligence.

2. WITH A LITTLE HELP FROM OUR FRIENDS:
Police in Oakland, California spent two hours attempting to subdue a gunman who had barricaded himself inside his home. After firing ten tear gas canisters, officers discovered that the man was standing beside them in the police line, shouting, "Please come out and give yourself up."

3. WHAT WAS PLAN B???
An Illinois man, pretending to have a gun, kidnapped a motorist and forced
him to drive to two different automated teller machines, wherein the
kidnapper proceeded to withdraw money from his own bank accounts.

4. THE GETAWAY!
A man walked into a Topeka, Kansas, Kwik Stop, and asked for all the
money in the cash drawer. Apparently, the take was too small, so he tied up the store clerk and worked the counter himself for three hours until police showed up and grabbed him.

5. DID I SAY THAT???
Police in Los Angeles had good luck with a robbery suspect who just
couldn't control himself during a lineup. When detectives asked each man in the lineup to repeat the words: "Give me all your money or I'll shoot," the man shouted, "That's not what I said!"

6. ARE WE COMMUNICATING??
A man spoke frantically into the phone, "My wife is pregnant and her
contractions are only two minutes apart!" "Is this her first child?" the
doctor asked. "No!" the man shouted, "This is her husband!"

7. NOT THE SHARPEST TOOL IN THE SHED!!
In Modesto, California, Steven Richard King was arrested for trying to hold
up a Bank of America branch without a weapon. King used a thumb and a
finger to simulate a gun, but fortunately, he failed to keep his hand in his
pocket (hellllllooooooo!)

8. THE GRAND FINALE (I LOVE THIS ONE!!!)
Last summer, down on Lake Isabella, located in the high desert, an hour
east of Bakersfield, California, some folks, new to boating, were having a
problem. No matter how hard they tried, they couldn't get their brand
new 22 ft. boat going. It was very sluggish in almost every maneuver, no matter how much power was applied. After about an hour of trying to make it go, they putted to a nearby marina, thinking someone there could tell them what was wrong. A thorough topside check revealed everything in perfect working condition. The engine ran fine, the out drive went up and down, and the prop was the correct size and pitch. So, one of the marina guys jumped in the water to check underneath. He came up choking on water, he was laughing so hard. NOW REMEMBER...THIS IS TRUE....Under the boat, still strapped securely in place, was the trailer.

[bad14u]

Too Funny!!!

[Irishgirl]

haha those are good

[andy420]

I have to say I'm depressed today but man did that put a smile on my face

[woodard]

Thanks Urso8up. Stuff like this always brigtens my day.

[Gongshow]

wow very funny!!!

[redneck99]

We as a human race are so brilliant!

LOL LOL Too funny!

[grifilken]

omg...them are some stupid sumbitches...

[Blackdream71]

2. WITH A LITTLE HELP FROM OUR FRIENDS:
Police in Oakland, California spent two hours attempting to subdue a gunman who had barricaded himself inside his home. After firing ten tear gas canisters, officers discovered that the man was standing beside them in the police line, shouting, "Please come out and give yourself up."




BWAHAHAHAHAHAHA, that's fuckin hysterical!

[speedracer59]

Originally posted by Blackdream71
2. WITH A LITTLE HELP FROM OUR FRIENDS:
Police in Oakland, California spent two hours attempting to subdue a gunman who had barricaded himself inside his home. After firing ten tear gas canisters, officers discovered that the man was standing beside them in the police line, shouting, "Please come out and give yourself up."




BWAHAHAHAHAHAHA, that's fuckin hysterical!

That would make a great "owned" pic

[hitmansb]

[STALKER]

bump funny shit..general stalker

[CiViC SpiKeS]

the boat one was the best..

[The Beast]

PEOPLE ARE DUMB AS HELL!!!

[telephone]

boat was on the trailer..holy shit..thats fuckin unbelievable..im speechless..lmao

[Kayak Jones]

Spend a couple of hours at a busy boat ramp on almost any lake in the summer and you will see how shit like that is possible. Free entertainmnent.

[urso8up]

Originally posted by woodard
Thanks Urso8up. Stuff like this always brigtens my day.

Glad i can help everyones day get brighter.