I just had to put my cat to sleep...

[coffee-guy]

Long story short....

I can't quit crying. I thought that I could handle this when it happened but I guess I am not as strong as I thought I was.

I have had this cat for almost 9 years now. I took her in when no one wanted her and I fought for her when my first wife tried to take her away from me. I also had to fight with my current wife in order to keep her. She was one of the best things that ever happened to me. I can remember the way that she always purred when I was around. She was so noisy with her purring that sometimes she would keep me awake at night.

Anyways, she was quite the tough one too. I once saw her pounce on a squirrel and use her back claws to open up its stomach (her front claws were gone when I first adopted her). You couldn't keep this cat in the house during the day but every night when I pulled in the driveway she would come running across the yard to greet me and come inside for the evening. She would leave me gifts of small animal heads on the front porch just to let me know how much she loved me. I can't believe that she's gone.

When I came home on Wednesday I heard her fighting with a cat in the bushes in front of our house. When I realized it was her I kicked into the bushes to get the other cat away from her. My cat went running into the garage licking her wounds and I just laughed at her. This was not the first time this particular cat had eaten her lunch but she always came back for more. She would normally sulk about it for a day or two and then bounce back to normal. However, this time when she came inside she seemed a little worse off than normal. I watched her try to jump up on top of our T.V. armoire (almost a 6 foot vertical - which she almost always managed) but she came up short and fell to the floor hard.

I didn't see her until the next morning and she was favoring the leg that she fell on. Also, the other cats and my wifes little dog were acting strange around her. I assumed that she was going to be o.k. but I put her in one of our spare bedrooms to keep a closer eye on her. I read about what I could give her to make any wounds etc feel better and proceeded to give her some infant formula ibuprofen.

I was going out of town Friday morning so I left my wife in charge of keeping an eye on my precious kitty. When I called to check on her over the weekend my wife was telling me how much better she seemed to be feeling and that she had been back out among the other animals with no problems. I was relieved and told her to give her a kiss for me. When I called my wife Saturday night she said that my cat had managed to sneak into the attic while my wife was in the garage and that she couldn't get her to come back down. I told her not to worry and that it was no big deal.

Unfortunately, when I got back into town tonight my cat was still in the attic and I couldn't get her to come to me. I finally managed to get her near a vent in the soffit overhang and pulled her out from the back of the house. She had a strange odor and there was a sore on the inside of her leg. I rushed her to the emergency clinic around 1 am and they told me not to worry, this type of thing happens more than I would think etc.

Well, I got a phone call about 1/2 an hour later telling me that it was very bad and extremely unexpected. The cut/bite she recieved had gotten infected and the muscles in her lower leg were rotting. I freaked out and told them that I would be right there. When I got there she was hooked up to the anesthetia machines and was lying there quietly. I lost it again but managed to pull myself halfway together when the vet came in.

He told me that he was going to see how far the visible damage was and that he could most likely amputate the leg without any problems. The only drawback was that if the infection had spread beyond the hip region that the operation would only add about 3-4 days to her life. I told him that I was only going to hope for the best and that I was not leaving until he got started. When I left everything seemed to be going well. I watched him shave her up to her belly and the tissue appeared to be o.k. The assistant told me that I would have to pick her up the next few mornings and take her to her regular vet and then bring her back at night so that she would have constant care for the next couple of days. I left with high hopes.

However, I just got the phone call about an hour ago. The doctor informed me that when he opened her up that he could see her infection had spread beyond the hip area and that my only option was to choose euthanasia. I have been pondering everything ever since.

I feel so terrible that I went out of town. I am worried that I wasn't concerned enough and that I caused her this pain. I worry that I made her suffer through this because I was naive and left her to heal alone. I can't imagine how bad she wanted to talk to me and tell me what was wrong. The only problem is that she was purring like always and acted happy when I left her at the vet just a few hours ago. I wish I could have only come home a day early. I can't get her out of my every thought. She was my everything. I am picking her up at 7 to bring her home to her resting place but it is going to be one of the hardest things I have ever done alone.

I am torn into pieces thinking about what life is going to be without her. At least I will always have this thread to keep her in my memories...

R.I.P. my lovely Frankie

? - 30 January 2006

[Arralou]

That is sad Pets always love you no matter what you do. I have a cat that looks almost just the same as yours, she is 13 years old and I have had her since I was 6. Just remember that your cat would never blame you.

[coffee-guy]

Thank you for your kind words.

Burial is such a sobering experience...

[Stonecold54]

I feel for you bro...and she looks EXACTLY like one of mine who is also the oldest. I dread the day when I lose any of them. now I will go have to hug them. I hope time heals your wounds but nothing can replace a companion.

[bad14u]

So sorry for your loss Bro. I know it won't make things any better, but she is in a far better place now and feeling no pain. Just hold on to the memories and try to realize that now she is back to her young, vibrant self with all the cat treats and milk one could ask for. She will always be a thought away.

[pumpd]

I'm sorry to hear that, very sad. Just one question tho... why did you let your cat go outside... the risk of getting a disease or hit by a car... I could never let my sweetie outside at all, I care too much for her.

[meat12]

sorry to hear bro

[bad14u]

Originally Posted by pumpd

I'm sorry to hear that, very sad. Just one question tho... why did you let your cat go outside... the risk of getting a disease or hit by a car... I could never let my sweetie outside at all, I care too much for her.

:hmmm: Bro...do not take this the wrong way....OR maybe you should....Your first post here and you are saying that FH didn't care for his cat enough? Are you saying you love your cat more than he loved his? Just pay your condolences and move on. Don't question FH on how much he cared or loved Frankie! I think it's pretty damn obvious he loved her from his post!

[Chadd77]

Damn bro. Sorry to hear about your loss. If anything would ever happen to my dog I would be devastated just like you are over your cat.

[coffee-guy]

Thanks everyone - I still have 2 dogs and 3 other cats hanging around here but it's just not the same...

I can't stand to look out my back window....

I did manage to plant some rose bulbs with her though so hopefully they will bloom this year and I can always think of her......

[malibu barbie]

I'm so sorry to hear about your sweet kitty.

[THE BOUNCER]

sorry to hear it buddy. she is now the guardian angel of your other animals. i lost my 12 week old puppy this past summer to the dog flu and it was a blow that i almost couldnt bare. the pain will heal with time. she will live on in you and watch over you for the rest of your life.

[Puddles]

Man...I'm so sorry. I only had to put down one of my pets, a german shepard at about 9 y.o. I was 15 and it still haunts me to this day. My cat is approaching 21 this year and I know the end isn't too far away but I've been thinking this for about 2 yrs. now so I feel very fortunate he's with us now. It's much harder when it's sudden like you've experienced.

Just remember that he had a good life and the cause of his death was also a part of what made him happy, the thrill he got from being so adventerous. He enjoyed his life here and you were a good owner letting him do what comes to him naturally.

RIP little friend.

[rude]

Sorry to hear about your loss bro, beautiful cat.

[hlcn8]

i had a cat like that as a kid, he'd fuck up any other cat in the neighborhood in his prime years but then he started getting old. infection was the same thing.
ya know, i still have a picture of me holding that cat as a kid, maybe 7 years old, and i look back on it fondly from time to time. and i think you'll do the same. i know that doesn't help now, but in time when all is healed you'll be allright, and you'll remember everything and know that you fought for the cat more than anyone else would. take care bro.

[Lmg2701]

Bro I usually don't reply to post like this cuz I just don't know what to say. Hearing of a pets passing away hits me really hard, maybe because I've never lost a really close loved one in life except for a pet that I had for 12 years. When I lost my pet I was heart broken and devastated and I know that's what you must be feeling now and my heart really does go out to you (same goes for you Juice with your dog). One thing that seems to make it easier, at least for me, is that I know without a doubt that my pet knew that I loved her with all my heart and I'm sure your pet knew this as well. It's a bond that can't be explained, somehow, they just know how much we care for them. I just wanted to say that I feel for you and that I've been in your shoes as I'm sure many others here have. The memories of your beloved pet will be fresh in your mind always but rest assured the pain of losing your cat will subside in time. Take care bro.

[Puma]

Dude, I can't even read your post because I will lose my shit. Just know that my thoughts are with you; I know how hard it is, and I know how much better you will feel when your ready for another cat. It took me a few years, but I am so much happier now that I have Buddy.

Just grieve for as long as it takes, and then decide if your ready for another cat. I know it was a very important part of my healing process.

I am so, so sorry for you.

[infiniti1982]

I'm really sorry bro, it feels horrible every time something very bad happens that reminds you you can't control everything in your life.

a similar thing happened to one of my cats several years ago and I was pretty upset for a while.

RIP frankie
RIP scotchy

[JUICE]

sorry to hear that bro

I know how it feels man, i too lost a good pet last week. Its hard when you have them for so much. But thier in a good place now.

[rado]

I thought my post was on here, guess not....So sorry to hear that..I could not imagine me life not having my rado........So sorry bro

[coffee-guy]

Thank you everyone for all of your kind words. I never thought that posting this and listening to anyone try to make me feel better would work but it has definetly helped.

I still look around the house for her from time to time and I miss her greeting me when I come home. The worst part is that I haven't been able to put her pillow or food bowls away...

[bad14u]

Originally Posted by fog_hat1981

Thank you everyone for all of your kind words. I never thought that posting this and listening to anyone try to make me feel better would work but it has definetly helped.

I still look around the house for her from time to time and I miss her greeting me when I come home. The worst part is that I haven't been able to put her pillow or food bowls away...

It will happen with time Bro. Don't rush to put things away just yet, more than likely you will end up mad at yourself for doing so. You will know when the time is right to pick up her stuff. Take care and God be with you.

[coffee-guy]

Well, everything is back to normal and I just wanted to say thank you to everyone who made this experience a little easier to cope with by listening to your words of ecouragement and understanding...

Thank You SM....