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#1
09-03-03, 08:52 AM
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Joke of the day!!
Everyone submit a joke here each day!! Let's just post written jokes here since we already have a Funny Picture Thread!!! Here's one to start things off:
Some people just don't know how to drive..... I call these people "Everybody but me" 
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FB's bitch!! 
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#2
09-03-03, 09:38 AM
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I cant think of one right now
__________________
Superior Muscle Does not promote the use of anabolic steroids without a doctor's prescription. The information shared is for learning purposes only. The Administrators, and Moderators of this site are not liable for any injury caused by the misuse of any chemical used for bodybuilding purposes. 1) DO NOT POST ASKING FOR A SOURCE!!!! 2)If you are a source, dont bother posting for business, it is clearly against the board's policy and you will be banned. 3)DO NOT PM OR EMAIL A MOD ABOUT A SOURCE!
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#5
09-03-03, 10:33 AM
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Two guys walk into a bar
You think the second one would have ducked.
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 “Reason is not automatic. Those who deny it cannot be conquered by it. Do not count on them ... The truth is not for all men, but only for those who seek it." - Ayn Rand
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#7
09-03-03, 12:09 PM
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Shortly after a pregnant woman gave birth with twins, she slipped into a coma. When she woke, the Dr told her that her brother had named the babies. Thinking what a moron her brother was, she was worried.
"What are the names?", she asked the Doctor. "The girl's name is Denise" he said. She thought to herself, not bad, I guess he's not such a moron after all. "What is the boy's name" she asked. "Denephew" the Doctor told her.
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www.massmonsterz.com Love one another and you will be happy. It's as simple and as difficult as that.
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#9
09-03-03, 12:15 PM
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why did the blonde swallow the condom?
she was out of birth control pills!
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space moutnain i mgiht be afrid of reodent sbut that dont mean i wont bash ur skull in with ur penis pump njjuicer-2004 MOD@WCBB MOD@CF
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#10
09-03-03, 12:36 PM
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what does the titantic and a blonde have in common?
no one is sure how many people went down on either of them.
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Train Hard or Go Home Small The greatest trick the devil ever pulled was convincing the world he doesnt exist.
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#11
09-03-03, 12:52 PM
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One I'm sure everyone has heard but I love it.
A pirate walks into a bar with a steering wheel atached to his balls. The bartender ask the pirate "Do you know you have a steering wheel atached to you balls?" The pirate responds "Aye, it's driving me nuts"
__________________
“Reason is not automatic. Those who deny it cannot be conquered by it. Do not count on them ... The truth is not for all men, but only for those who seek it." - Ayn Rand
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#12
09-03-03, 02:16 PM
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The Italian says,
"When I have a-finished makina love with my girl-a-friend, I go down and gently tickle the back of her knees. She floatsa 6 inches abova da bed in ecstasy". The Frenchman replies, "Zat is nothing, when Ah 'ave finished making ze love with ze girlfriend Ah kiss all ze way down her body and zen Ah lick ze soles of her feet with mah tongue and she floats 12 inches above ze bed in pure ecstasy". The Irishman says, "Dat's nottin'. When Oi've finished sh*ggin'me bord, I get out of da bed, walk over to d'window and wipe me knob on da curtain. She hits da fockin' roof.
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"Many people think they are thinking when they are merely rearranging their prejudices" ... William James
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#13
09-03-03, 02:21 PM
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A mother was working in the kitchen listening to her 5-year-old son playing with his new electric train in the living room.
She heard the train stop and her son saying, "All of you sons of bitches who want off, get the hell off now...cause this is the last stop! And all of you sons of bitches who are getting on, get your asses in the train...cause we're going down the tracks." The horrified mother went in and told her son, "We don't use that kind of language in this house. Now I want you to go to your room and you are to stay there for TWO HOURS. When you come out, you may play with your train...but I want you to use nice language." Two hours later, the son came out of the bedroom and resumed playing with his train. Soon the train stopped and the mother heard her son say..."All passengers, please remember your things, thank you and hope your trip was a pleasant one. We hope you will ride with us again soon." She heard her little darling continue..."For those of you just boarding, remember, there is no smoking on the train. We hope you will have a pleasant and relaxing journey with us today." As the mother began to smile, the child added, "For those of you who are pissed off about the TWO HOUR delay, please see the bitch in the kitchen
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"Many people think they are thinking when they are merely rearranging their prejudices" ... William James
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#19
09-04-03, 03:41 AM
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Quote:
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"Many people think they are thinking when they are merely rearranging their prejudices" ... William James
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#21
09-08-03, 08:03 PM
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that a way juicer lol
__________________
Superior Muscle Does not promote the use of anabolic steroids without a doctor's prescription. The information shared is for learning purposes only. The Administrators, and Moderators of this site are not liable for any injury caused by the misuse of any chemical used for bodybuilding purposes. 1) DO NOT POST ASKING FOR A SOURCE!!!! 2)If you are a source, dont bother posting for business, it is clearly against the board's policy and you will be banned. 3)DO NOT PM OR EMAIL A MOD ABOUT A SOURCE!
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#22
09-08-03, 08:03 PM
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Quote:
__________________
Superior Muscle Does not promote the use of anabolic steroids without a doctor's prescription. The information shared is for learning purposes only. The Administrators, and Moderators of this site are not liable for any injury caused by the misuse of any chemical used for bodybuilding purposes. 1) DO NOT POST ASKING FOR A SOURCE!!!! 2)If you are a source, dont bother posting for business, it is clearly against the board's policy and you will be banned. 3)DO NOT PM OR EMAIL A MOD ABOUT A SOURCE!
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#24
09-08-03, 09:38 PM
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lol very nice
__________________
Superior Muscle Does not promote the use of anabolic steroids without a doctor's prescription. The information shared is for learning purposes only. The Administrators, and Moderators of this site are not liable for any injury caused by the misuse of any chemical used for bodybuilding purposes. 1) DO NOT POST ASKING FOR A SOURCE!!!! 2)If you are a source, dont bother posting for business, it is clearly against the board's policy and you will be banned. 3)DO NOT PM OR EMAIL A MOD ABOUT A SOURCE!
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#25
09-09-03, 04:48 PM
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>While I was driving down the road the other day (going a
>>little faster >>than I should have been) I passed over a bridge only to see a cop >>on the >>other side with a radar gun laying in wait. The cop >>pulled me over, >>walked up to the car, and with that classic patronizing smirk we >>all >>know about, asked "what's your hurry?" >> >>To which I replied, "I'm late for work." >> >>To which he asked, "What do you do?" >> >>"I'm a rectum stretcher," I responded. >> >>The cop was surprised and confused. "A what? A rectum stretcher?? >>And >>just what does a rectum stretcher do?" >> >>"Well," I said, "I start by inserting one finger, then I work my >>way up >>to two fingers, then three, then four, then with my >>whole hand in I work side to side until I can get both hands in, >>and >>then I slowly but surely stretch the hole, until it's about >>6 feet." >> >>Then the cop asked questioningly and cautiously, "And just what do >>you >>do with a six-foot asshole?" >>To which I politely replied, "You give him a radar gun and park him >>behind a bridge ..."
__________________
“Reason is not automatic. Those who deny it cannot be conquered by it. Do not count on them ... The truth is not for all men, but only for those who seek it." - Ayn Rand
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#26
09-11-03, 10:17 AM
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Bless me Father, for I have sinned. I have been with a loose woman.
The Priest asks," Is that you little Tommy Shaughnessy?" "Yes, Father, it is." "And, who was the woman you were with?" "I can't be tellin you, Father. I don't want to ruin her reputation." "Well, Tommy, I'm sure to find out sooner or later, so you may as well tell me now... was it Brenda O'Malley?" "I cannot say." "Was it Patricia Kelly?" "I'll never tell." "Was it Liz Shannon?" "I'm sorry, but I can't name her." "Was it Cathy Morgan?" "My lips are sealed." "Was it Fiona McDonald, then?" "Please, Father, I cannot tell you." The Priest sighs in frustration. "You're a steadfast lad, Tommy Shaughnessy, and I admire that. But you've sinned and you must atone. You cannot attend church mass for three months. Be off with you now." Tommy walks back to his pew. His friend Sean slides over and whispers, "What'd you get?" "Three months vacation and five good leads."
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