Dating outside of school...how has it been for you?

[Taylor]

I'm 20 years old and attending college full time, so far every girl that i've dated has been in school too. I've dated two girls that didn't go to the same school as I did but generally i've met all my girls at the school i was going to at the time.

the question i have i guess i will ask before i explain my situation...
when you first started dating a professional whose making a living in the real world how did that compare to dating in college, in my case I am still in college hoping to date someone not still in college......I'm more of a home body i dont like to drink, i dont like to go out every night, once or twice a week is fine with me but nearly every girl in college that i meet needs so much attention (not to mention the girls from high school as well), they'll want to go out every night...i understand spending time together is important in a relationship, lol...but 24/7 is honestly a little bit of overkill

the girl i'm after right now is between 22-25, i haven't asked her...but she's my physical therapist for a shoulder injury i've got and i just feel like we've gotten along really great and i'd like for it to develop a little more. I feel comfortable around her, i enjoy being around her but I still feel nerves about trying to take it a step higher because I've never approached any female outside of school...i don't mean i shy away from girls away from school but i've never sought out or attempted to hook up with a older women, who has finished with school and is working a full time job.....until now....

I understand she's not 40 with a couple children and she's only a few years older but her working full time and earning a good bit of money while im just going to school is what's really working my nerves i believe...

if anybody has experienced a simliar situation, was this even an issue or am i just bothered over nothing?


i guess what im wanting to ask all of you is how a relationship with an adult is different then a relationship with a college student..i know it will vary depending on the person but I'm just asking on past experiences...


my mind isn't working right now for some reason...i guess cause my yankees are getting their ass beat ...i had a few more questions but that's all i can spit out right now


btw, i got two more therapy sessions with this girl, i guess the plan is on the 2nd day i'd like to invite her to coffee after she gets off work or meet up with her during a lunch break, just a short kinda get together to talk for about half an hour........good idea, any better ones?

[Puddles]

I think you should wait until therapy is completely over. Mixing business with pleasure is a no-no.

Since she had to go to school herself, she would be understanding of your current situation and wouldn't expect you to be spending a lot of money and time on her...unless she's just that type of girl.

But on the other hand, she's done with school and may want more than you can provide.

The only way to find out is by asking her out and getting to know her outside of the current situation you know her in.

Good luck!

[Taylor]

Originally Posted by Puddles

I think you should wait until therapy is completely over. Mixing business with pleasure is a no-no.

thats why i was wanting to wait till the last day, i have two more days left with her, and i really didn't want to make the rest of the sessions awkward just in case for whatever odd reason she may not feel the same as i do......that couldn't be it tho

















hopefully

[fog_hat1981]

If you don't give it a shot you will never know. Honestly though, what's it going to hurt to give it a go? If she says no you walk away knowing how to handle the next situation better. If she says yes and it turns out to be a rough situation then you walk away knowing how to handle the next situation better. If she says yes and it works out you may live happily ever after.

Live and Learn...

Have you ever heard the saying "I wish I knew then what I know now?" The only way to become old and wise in the ways of the world is to be young and experience as much as possible now. Just balls up and ask her out!!!!!!!

Don't shit where u eat. I don't date from the gym work school, etc I wont date people from places I visit all the time, so if anything does get wierd it doesn't affect my daily life

K

[Taylor]

Originally Posted by num1son

Don't shit where u eat. I don't date from the gym work school, etc I wont date people from places I visit all the time, so if anything does get wierd it doesn't affect my daily life

K

where do you choose from?


me personally, i'm very picky and some girls just have a special "thing" about them that i see that i can't really describe its just some thing that attracts me to them...and when i find a girl like that, who i enjoy being around i try to make something of it regardless of where i meet them...it just happens to be that this is the first "adult" more or less that has my attention

with this girl specifically i only have two more days with her if things don't work out, so fog hit it pretty much, nothing to lose except maybe a slight bit of pride for a week....got a lot more to gain

guess its just those common nerves got me looking for reassurance on the boards

[fog_hat1981]

You'll be fine bro - it's all in your head. There's no need to come down on yourself if she says no. Hell, she may be the one with issues and it doesn't always mean anything against you. You control the amount of confidence you portray (even if you're not the most confident person in the world you can still come off confident).

Good luck and keep us posted (no pun intended) .

Originally Posted by Taylor

where do you choose from?


me personally, i'm very picky and some girls just have a special "thing" about them that i see that i can't really describe its just some thing that attracts me to them...and when i find a girl like that, who i enjoy being around i try to make something of it regardless of where i meet them...it just happens to be that this is the first "adult" more or less that has my attention

with this girl specifically i only have two more days with her if things don't work out, so fog hit it pretty much, nothing to lose except maybe a slight bit of pride for a week....got a lot more to gain

guess its just those common nerves got me looking for reassurance on the boards

Friends of friends(so not to be too close contact) thru sports(when I played) hell i meet girls everywhere, shopping, book stores, I dont' go lookin for them just being polite and starting convo's is really all you need to do

K

[Stonecold54]

well I think its good you realize there is a difference between people who are still in school and the real world. i think the only difference is there is a definite maturity level needed for a "real" world relationship. and as far as your physical therapist, when your sessions are done tell her you want to take her out to dinner for doing such a nice job with your shoulder (even if she sucked, lol). I am with num1son though, I meet girls everywhere (and I am married ) all it takes is a smile and conversation.

Originally Posted by stonecold54

well I think its good you realize there is a difference between people who are still in school and the real world. i think the only difference is there is a definite maturity level needed for a "real" world relationship. and as far as your physical therapist, when your sessions are done tell her you want to take her out to dinner for doing such a nice job with your shoulder (even if she sucked, lol). I am with num1son though, I meet girls everywhere (and I am married ) all it takes is a smile and conversation.

Are you talking bout real world like on mtv :laughnew: yah that is the real world

K

[Taylor]

she had an engagement ring

i fell pretty quick for this one.....their few and far in between but when i find someone i'm really into i fall for em pretty quick

get to see her one more day next week then that may be it...maybe i should go ahead and offer her my friendship?

i still find it hard to believe she's engaged, she's so young! do girls occasionally wear the engagement/wedding bands of their mom after they pass? Do women wear jewelry that resembles engagement rings on their left ring finger that is not necessarily an ENGAGEMENT ring?
i'm 20 so i'm not knowledgable on the whole ring deals, maybe i should be but i'm not

[Shibby]

She's not as youg as you percieve. My Fiancee is 21. Simply say you have noticed the ring and ask her fiance's name. It's descreet and gets you the answer.

[Taylor]

ever since i've seen it i have been saying "i cannot believe she is engaged" over and over, lol

it simply isn't believable, she's so young she's got what looks to be a great career going for her and i just can't imagine her being already tied down

oh well, if she is there really isn't much i can do about it unfortuneatly....hopefully things work out

[Shibby]

Yep, you sound like your 20. Not eveyone has the same goals in life.