Training with the signifigant other

[Megiddo]

How many of you guys do this? The reason I ask is that my wife is constantly complaining about her ass and thighs even though she does a ton of cardio. I explained that even with cardio she still needs to do some lifting and aksed her to try a week with me just to see how she liked it. Is this going to cause a problem with us as i am pretty intense but I do want her to get in better shape than sh eis right now.

[voneber]

If you are pretty intense, there could be a problem.
I had my wife work out with me for a week or so and after she said she wouldn't work out with me again. She said that I tried to push her too hard. I thought that I was taking it easy on her and giving her lots of encouragement and definately not pushing her the way I would with a male training partner. But she saw it differently apparently... and to be honest she was kind of annoying me with her questions about my form like "aren't you going to far down when squatting?" (I was only going to parallel, but apparently at her gym they aren't taught that), so the little comments started getting to me and to be honest, when she said she didn't want to work out with me anymore I was kind of relieved.

So you could give it a try, it may work out if she is intense and has the desire to push herself the way you do. But if it doesn't work out don't be too suprised.

Good Luck Bro

V

[Megiddo]

I've actually ran off a few people because of the amount of effort i put into my workouts. I actually don't want to have a constant workout with her as we get off owrk about 2 hours apart and I would like to be married for at least a month before getting divorced. I would like to just show her some routines and help her with her form to get her tight.

[voneber]

Well, if you are just going to show her a few things to tighten up and not have her follow you through one of your workouts with you, then I don't see any reason not to try training her or training with you. I thought you meant you were going to put her through one of your workouts.

Good luck then

Just my two cents

V

[shiko24]

come up with a routine for her to follow do not workout with her but instead train her show her what to do this will give her what she needs to work out on her own without you pushing her to hard or making her not want to workout all together

ask her what she wants to get out of working out then make a workout program just for her this should do the trick

[decadecadeca]

Tried it with the wife, same result as Voneber. Said I was being too mean or too serious. Kinda like working with your wife, screws with the whole love dynamic. I say point her in the right direction and answer any questions she may have but don't volunteer anything, don't push and don't workout together.

[bowbow]

First off if your newly married I wouldn't push to much on her as far as needing to do more excercises.Weight issues are a very sensitive subject and it doesn't take much to upset a woman. Just show her a few basics and proper form and leave it alone. I myself enjoy working out with my wife. We work out at home so some company is nice. She does her thing and I do mine. When she has questions I answer them.

[sana]

it depends on the woman. there are many women i know that is more intense in the gym then their other half.

[Mr incredible]

My other half is pretty intense, I go to the gym to get away from her!!!!!!

[Megiddo]

well today she gets to train with me on leg day of all days which is one of her weak points anyhow.

Before we even started I asked her what her goals were and what she wanted to get out of the gym which is toning up. Hopefully I can help her enough to give her some confidence to start training with weights on her own.

She is a good sport and really wants me there to help her out and train with her. We'll see how long this works out.

[sana]

REMEMBER TO TELL HER THAT SHE NEEDS TO LIFT HEAVY. THAT SHE WILL NOT GET BULKY OR GROW AN INSANE AMOUNT OF MUSCLE IF SHE DOES!!!

women just don't grow like that and to look "tone" , it means she wants to grow muscle. to grow muscle, as mr. big ron coleman says , you gotta lift heavy ass weights!

HEAVY HEAVY HEAVY!

[Megiddo]

Very true Sana. I'm going to take it easy on her today, wish I could say the same for myself, and show her good exercises and proper form. Hopefully the knee will hold out today as I am persoanlly getting some good cuts in my quads.

[GearTripper]

for the bulk of my main training, i prefer to do it alone. every once in a while though, my girl will tag along and i'll make sure she's on the right path more or less. she knows her routine and remains in good form on her own. she's dedicated enough to where i don't need to push her all the time.

[swollenmember]

props to your wife, atleast she is in the gym and trying to improve herself. Just a thought, you could get her a few training sessions with a female trainer at your gym and then you dont have to worry about being to tough on her, let her get her foundation for lifting with her and maybe she'll want to show you how much she learned and can handle,...... i dont know, just a thought

[monkeygirl]

I used to work out with my boyfriend a lot, then due to schedule changes, I had to start working out alone. Now that we CAN work out together again, I still prefer to be alone. I push myself much harder than I did with my boyfriend. I am way more focused without him, and I hate taking long breaks between sets! He showed me good form, and although I miss having a spot sometimes, I can live without it.
Hopefully, this will happen with her, too. If not, maybe she could find a friend who needs some help- if she is the one teaching, she will probably be more motivated and feel good about lifting. (After you show her proper form, of course!)

P.S. If she thinks that lifting will bulk up her thighs, maybe you can show her some of the pics of members here to let her know that women just don't naturally bulk! Many of the women here lift as heavy as they can, and are not big at all.

[dl1874]

Hello, this is DL1874's wife. We tried the exact same thing right before we got married and the idea crashed somewhat as I got my feelings hurt and pissed off. I think it's okay to show her a routine as long as you don't make her FEEL like she's not trying hard or failing. For example, my husband and I went to the park to jog 10 miles. While I was proud of myself for the long distance, he was frustrated that I was tiring so soon (after mile 5). It turned into a fight. Just remember to keep her feelings in mind during the process.

P.S. My husband has a man crush on Vander! : )

[redneck99]

Sometimes it's just the motivation of going to the gym together.... If she thinks you're being to hardcore, go to the gym together but do different things while you're in there. You could be hitting chest super heavy, and she could do her leg thing, or whatever. If she needs some advice you're right there, and you can keep an eye on her. Also, if you really need one, she's there for a spot my 2¢

This way you're there together but not being too critical with one another.

[SloppyJo]

yea i totally agree with redneck on that

[azurescen]

my wife does tons of cardio too but still has a little to spare in the hips and thighs. i've tried to get her to do HIIT instead of cardio a few times a week but she is so stuck on her friggin cardio. she started lifting to put on some muscle but is so paranoid about looking big and manly that she has gone back to cardio again.

[w8liftinglady]

It's hard when you have two different fitness goals.I tried to work out with my <ex> husband,but he just wouldn't put forth the effort(wanting to spot train,while I was a powerlifter).My boyfriend now is as hardcore as I am,and I love working out with him...we push each other,and have worked out 4X week without fail for over a year.I agree with the other guys who basically said design a plan,show her good form,and let her decide how intense to make it.If she knows you at all,she will know your commitment to training,and not interfere with that.Good luck(and congrats for being a sweet husband)