Need advice

[soprano9mm]

I have been with my girl now for almonst 2 years. About seven months into the relationship she had a really bad car accident resulting in her becoming addicted to oxycotins. Now I had no idea for about six months and she finally broke down and told me. she also admitted that she had been on kolonopin when she got in the accident. So I put her in a counciling and she entered a methodone clinic. Since the accident our relationship has gotten worse and worse. She consistantly crys like almost everyday, she goes ape-shit and pulls out her own hair and punches herself in the face. She thinks I always with other girls, almost every phone call she will ask me "whos with you" " are you with another girl" Even when I am at work or at home with my parents!!!!! Its gotten to the point were my family doesnt want her around, her family thinks I should dump her. I'm scared to pull the trigger on it though because she is so crazy. I'm scared she might call my probation officer or the police on me and try and say something stupid. Or even worse try and kill herself which she has threatened to do several times. She has a trailor trash family who brought her up in a hell hole. and now that she is all fucked up on drugs I think alot of her childhood problems are coming back. I have put up with this for a year now and I have actually met a girl who I like alot but its all on hold becuase I cant pull the trigger and tell my girl its over. I have not cheated on her or anything like that but Its probably coming. I really do love her but se are so different and she has so many problems that I dont see us ever geting married and I'm honestly scared to have a child with her because mental illness runs in her family. This new girl I have known for like a year and she 100% sicilian like me (which is hard to find around here) own a house already and her family is friends with mine. We get alone amazingly well and she goes to the gym and is exteremely attractive. What the fuck do I do????

[bad14u]

If you didn't see yourself spending the rest of your life with this girl...why have you been together for this amount of time??? I honestly don't know what to tell you here!!! Get her some help and get the hell out before the madness is directed at you and she does something stupid like trying to hurt you or worse!!!

[soprano9mm]

Another problem is I think she knows its coming and she is being like all sad in a totally different tone of voice the last couple days...Its really sad I'm all this girl has....she is gonna hit rock bottom as soon as I leave for sure

[imonboardtoo]

Maybe you can get her in a resident program and break it off while she's got people to work it out with. You can have her Baker Act'ed and she won't be able to refuse if you fear she'll hurt herself or others.

Tuff issues to balance. If you do nothing, something will push you or her over the edge in a direction you probably won't be able to control. I say act. At least you won't have to think later..."I should've done something."

[bad14u]

Originally posted by imonboardtoo
At least you won't have to think later..."I should've done something."

:agree: :agree: :agree: :agree: :agree:

[BIKER_GIXXER]

Originally posted by imonboardtoo
Maybe you can get her in a resident program and break it off while she's got people to work it out with. You can have her Baker Act'ed and she won't be able to refuse if you fear she'll hurt herself or others.

Tuff issues to balance. If you do nothing, something will push you or her over the edge in a direction you probably won't be able to control. I say act. At least you won't have to think later..."I should've done something."

I think he nailed it right on the head with this one, it's what I would do.

[Rhinosaurus]

This might sound selfish but you have to think of yourself, your well being, and your future. I wish you the best and hang in there.

[soprano9mm]

Originally posted by imonboardtoo
Maybe you can get her in a resident program and break it off while she's got people to work it out with. You can have her Baker Act'ed and she won't be able to refuse if you fear she'll hurt herself or others.

Tuff issues to balance. If you do nothing, something will push you or her over the edge in a direction you probably won't be able to control. I say act. At least you won't have to think later..."I should've done something."

How do I go about this..thanx

[imonboardtoo]

I'd look in the phone book under city/county government and look for a social service agency that deals with mental health. call them and ask for a referral to somewhere that could help her. Think about cost too...if her insurance won't cover or she doesn't have any, only a very few places will take her. You may have to call several.

You may have to give them alot of details about how you feel she'll hurt herself or others, so be ready to talk about it. Then, you can go one of several routes...call the cops for them to come out and they'll call for an ambulance to take her to the place (they're gonna have to see some craziness to make the call)...or...tell her you got an appt. for her at a place to talk about how she can he helped - go to the place - and get her admitted (by the time she figures it out it'll be too late)...or maybe the agency will send someone out to assess it all.

Either way, "intervention" is what this is about and don't expect any grattitude from her in the short run. She's probably gonna curse you like crazy, but you can write to her and explain shit and hope that she eventually gets it. You WILL be helping her, and if you're gonna move on, you gotta get away.

Good luck, S.

[soprano9mm]

thanks fo rthe advice, I will let you know what happens

[imonboardtoo]

Do that, man. We're in your corner.

[Dinatos8282]

I agree, you have to think about yourself. You have invested enough time into a dead end relationship. Get her into a good program and wash your hands of it. You can not put your life and future on hold to tend to constantly tend to another persons needs, who in all honesty probably needs more then you can offer.

[imonboardtoo]

You're right, D. How's life in hogtown these days? Been years since I've been back. Go Gators.

[soprano9mm]

So I broke up with her yesturday, she went nuts smashed a bunch of shit in her room. Cried then came over last night and got her shit. She called today and seemed ok, but we will see . If she looses it I will call the hospital right away.

[bad14u]

Originally posted by soprano9mm
So I broke up with her yesturday, she went nuts smashed a bunch of shit in her room. Cried then came over last night and got her shit. She called today and seemed ok, but we will see . If she looses it I will call the hospital right away.

Glad to hear you are still alive and unscathed from the breakup!!! I think if she was going to hurt herself she would have done it at that moment of the breakup, but as for you, she may build up some resentment and take it out on you later..so watch out!!! Best of luck!!!