i think i'm doomed to be alone

[Bdubb]

Good luck with it all. The past two years of my life have been hell and I am still trying to deal with something similar to you as well. I just tried too hard and invested too much only to get shit on, yet still want her...

I ask myself, why can't she just be gone like all the rest of the girls? Why do I have to keep inflicting pain on myself by still wanting to pursue her, instead of turning my head and walking away like all the other girls I've dated in my life.

[bonebreaker]

Originally posted by Bdubb
Good luck with it all. The past two years of my life have been hell and I am still trying to deal with something similar to you as well. I just tried too hard and invested too much only to get shit on, yet still want her...

I ask myself, why can't she just be gone like all the rest of the girls? Why do I have to keep inflicting pain on myself by still wanting to pursue her, instead of turning my head and walking away like all the other girls I've dated in my life.

Unfortunately for the great majority of us humans, we tend to want the things the most that we can't have. And usually when we get it, it doesn't mean near as much to us, but lose it, and we want it again. Just our nature, and some of us are our own worst enemies. BB

[Scotland]

I think bonebreaker touches on an important but overlooked concept. "Wanting what you don't have" and "Fixing what can't be fixed without going back in time". You'll have regrets, it is just part of life. It is healthy to have some regrets but not dwell on them or your current life will be spent chasing a past you can not correct. You, I . . . we will desire the unknown and yurn for what may be unattainable. Best advice is to be happy with what you have and make the best of it while you have it. Doing your best at the moment decreases regret if it doesn't last. When you walk away thinking "I coulda, shoulda, woulda" then you set yourself up for failure. Carpe Dium (seize the day). You are the creator of your own destiny and you have to take responsibility for that.

I have been in your shoes, my 1st 3 years at Camp Lejeune I thought I was "doomed to be alone". 98% males. You have to push past your fears. That is not light advice. Fear will stop you from living.

[bonebreaker]

Originally posted by Scotland
I think bonebreaker touches on an important but overlooked concept. "Wanting what you don't have" and "Fixing what can't be fixed without going back in time". You'll have regrets, it is just part of life. It is healthy to have some regrets but not dwell on them or your current life will be spent chasing a past you can not correct. You, I . . . we will desire the unknown and yurn for what may be unattainable. Best advice is to be happy with what you have and make the best of it while you have it. Doing your best at the moment decreases regret if it doesn't last. When you walk away thinking "I coulda, shoulda, woulda" then you set yourself up for failure. Carpe Dium (seize the day). You are the creator of your own destiny and you have to take responsibility for that.

I have been in your shoes, my 1st 3 years at Camp Lejeune I thought I was "doomed to be alone". 98% males. You have to push past your fears. That is not light advice. Fear will stop you from living.

Very well put. BB