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i never felt this before

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  • #31
    Originally posted by hitmansb
    Man, I didn't realize she was your first love. When you look back a few weeks/months down the road, you'll realize that first love is truly blind. You're going to discover all kinds of negative personality traits that she had, and you'll be wondering how the hell you tolerated her for so long. Happened to me...at first, I was hurtin for a few weeks (tho not quite as much as you are prolly, since I was the one who ended it). Looking back a few months later, I was dumbfounded as to why I dated the girl for as long as I did in the first place.


    yup shes my first girl man.

    The thing is we both have bad attitutes. She easily gets hurt, or at any moment could be pissed off for no reason. As for me, the way i talk at times sounds rude and mean but i dont mean it to come out that way, guess its my tone of voice. So at times we would clash here and there, but the nest thing u know it, we were ok. This went on for a while.

    But what caught me off guard and kills me is that i recently made a thread on how much feelings i got towards her. I would explain to her and stuff, she'd be like i feel the same way to you too. So this weekend we were out of town for 3 days. It all went well, spend the best time with her there. So Monday didnt see her, saw herin school Tuesday and On Wednesday. I just get a phone call from her telling me this. I was crushed bro. I went to her house, but she had anger towards me, wanted me to leave. Then she gave me a ride home and didnt wanna see me or something. Thats what I dont understand, why so much anger towards me and hate. I tried talking to her, but she refuse.

    Im the type, that I will sit and listen not making ugly faces nor like "ok your wasting my time" sorta guy. I sit and listen but this girl was disgusted or just pissed at me. Shes snapped at me before like this , that she just wants me out. She either has issues, or someshits bothering her personally. She also told me just out of the blue that shes gonna leave out of town and study just like that. Ive never once lied, cheated, nor layed a hand on her, so i dont know why or what to do. She hasnt called me nor have i called her. I dont wanna call her and get all hurt up by her telling me shit or hanging up on me. I got so much feelings right now, love, hate, hurt, everything. Close friends have asked me if shes cheating on me or something. She says she will never do such a thing, but u know people. If thats the case since i cant do shit to her, boy would i love to have some fun and let the anger out on the person whos shes with, if thats the case. But I just hope not.

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    • #32
      Originally posted by Shibby
      and for those first loves that don't work out and after you start dating again. You will start to notice that your first love is everything you don't want in a woman.

      thats what everyones been telling me. They tell me, hey juice "learn from this one man". All my buddies and family is hurting too man, all shocked. I guess it was time, and time to learn from the past. Gotta move forward now.

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      • #33
        Hang in their bud. I know it's tough. you may remember my post almost a year ago concerning me and my nearly 6yr g/f splitting up and how I just couldn't cope. The bottom line is time does heal the pain...and it will get easier. It may take a few weeks, few months or even longer but it does get easier to deal. You really need to stay busy and focus on moving forward. It hurts man...I know...I still love my girl w/all my heart and I think of her everyday. However, at the same time when I am thinking clearly I do realize that there were a lot of things we truly did not have in common and just how much I compromised my beliefs and other parts of my life to make her happy. I had Bouncer delete that post awhile back because I did not want to be reminded of that painful and weak time in my life. You will learn from this one and more than likely end up in a similar situation again...who knows...being vulnerable and caring for someone feels incredible, but when it doesn't work it damn near destroys you. The thing is, that if you didn't have the pain and sadness you would have no way of knowing what the pleasure happiness felt like. Take it day by day and live each of them to the fullest.

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        • #34
          Juice I was thinking today about how music has helped me through some hard times. Finding songs that I can really relate to at the time. Well one I was thinking of that might help if you want to check it out is Keith Urban - "You'll Think of Me"

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          • #35
            Originally posted by Shibby
            Juice I was thinking today about how music has helped me through some hard times. Finding songs that I can really relate to at the time. Well one I was thinking of that might help if you want to check it out is Keith Urban - "You'll Think of Me"


            yup, music helps me out alot. Basically all day , yesterday ive been studying with some headphones on. Music for me ios the best, not only in situations like these, but relaxes me.

            Ive told people before that i can be in a 8 by 8 room, small with nothing inside but a cd player and shitloads of all kinds of cds. Love music.




            Still since Wednesday, she hasnt called me.

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            • #36
              Originally posted by JUICE
              Still since Wednesday, she hasnt called me.
              And if she does call, don't answer. Trust me on that. This "let's still be friends stuff is bullshit": clean breaks are best.

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              • #37
                Originally posted by hitmansb
                And if she does call, don't answer. Trust me on that. This "let's still be friends stuff is bullshit": clean breaks are best.

                i rather end it clean than hurting someone. I never once was mean to her nor cussed her out, i wouldnt never even though she's call.


                I believe u in the lets still be friends part.

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                • #38
                  The only way you can just be friends is to be apart long enough that those feelings go away. You have to redevelop the relationship based on friendship. If there are any feelings of intamcy love then it's too soon.

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                  • #39
                    J-Man I can't help but shake my head at this post buddy. This was me about 3 or 4 years ago. No joke, same exact scenario. I was with my girl for 7 1/2 years and just like that it all ended. It's definitely a reality check, but it also put things in perspective for me. I was into bad shit all the time, no goals other than getting wasted and hanging out with friends. I finally realized that there was more to life and I deserved to give myslef a chance to live a happy life. Nothing we tell you will ease the pain, only time can do that. Right now it seems like there is no way you can get over it and all you can think about are the times you spent together and how it will be without her.

                    My advice is just to take it day by day, DON'T BEG or BUG and just get your shit straight man. Not for her, but for yourself.

                    WM

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                    • #40
                      Originally posted by wheyman
                      My advice is just to take it day by day, DON'T BEG or BUG and just get your shit straight man. Not for her, but for yourself.

                      WM

                      yeah man, i gotta start doing things for me. Fuck if i continue this way, i will never be able to do shit. Gotta think of my future and stuff like that, worry about me.

                      For now, studies are the solution. As a hobbie, im gonna get back into training today. Gotta beef up and boost my confidence once more. People tell me, hey man hit the weights again, they noticed how confidence and awesome i felt.

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