Y I do what I do its personal though...

[num1son]

i saw her couple months ago but didnt talk (her bro and I are best friends so i saw him and didnt know she was home in the summer )to her shes so scared cus i'm the only guy she ever loved and ever kissed, she hurts that Im not close to her

K

[Shibby]

Oh she didn't leave you just went to schools far apart? If so, I'm missing why she isn't trying to be with you if she still loves you?

[num1son]

we went diff ways with school I took sports school path she took school we kinda grew apart and it caused a lot of hurt too her, she has only kissed 1 guy and thats me, but i understand her hurt, but at the time i chose sports and school and u see how the sports thing ended up

K

[num1son]

if it makes sense she is a few yrs behind me... so i left her for sports and school then she left for school so me taking that initial leave prob didint help my cause

K

[Shibby]

Yea, that part touched me. I am a former soccer player myself. I stopped playing after I cracked my tibia. Nothing quite as major as yours, but I was playing on a shity field, went for a slide tackle, my under foot cleet got caught in a whole, and I'm sure you can figure the rest. I could have wen't back and played, but my life changed to make it short.

[num1son]

yah i never wanted to give it up and still have hope but now I've had too many head surgeries to fix things where structurally I have no protection...yah she was delicate and gentle so it hurt her so much to see me go and follow my dreams, oddly at the time she should have been my dreams
yah shitty fields no thank you I played on soldiers field a few times and ouch even for a pro stadium the constant football games and fire games tore it up nice

K

[num1son]

Wow num1son, you really opened up to her. I hope she understands by reading your letter that you care so much about her and that you want to keep her safe. I hope she shows the same appreciation to you or at least tells you how she feels. Let us know her reaction if you would like.

I wish you the best of luck.

THanks for the imput, yah i talked to her brother about it and he suggests we switch cars for the week just incase she comes to plant a nice explosive device under mine, but then we decided it wasnt such a good idea considering shes got reasons to destroy his car too...yah girls heart is fragile i just hope I wrote it gently enuf for her

K

[Shibby]

You said in your letter also about the possibilty of her getting mad. There is nothing for her to get mad at. You just told her how you feel.

[num1son]

mad... well would u be mad if the only person that ever took a chance with u left to pursue sports and school...shes never had another guy into her so shes all alone now, its her sr yr in college so i decided to give it one last shot the problem is for her masters shes headin to MIT Harvard or Cal tech... none of which is close to IL and my home school Loyola <----nerds we both are

K

[Shibby]

Well after this long if it makes her mad it's because she still feels so much for you. But if you aren't not planning on going to her and you know she isn't coming back to that area, why send it?

[num1son]

Cus I will wait, i make enuf green to visit often too... plus theres summers breaks etc...I'm really willing...who knows maybe I can get her to go to UNIV of Chicago or Loyola :)

K

[Shibby]

Umm, do either of those schools have a comparable grad program to MIT, Harvard, or Cal tech? lol

[num1son]

UNIV of chicago is top... better than Harvard but not MIT or Cal tech
U really think I can give up its been 7 yrs that I have known her and my feelings haven't vanished

K

[num1son]

I'm still considering going to univ of chicago for masters work in particle physics...Got accepted just haven't really figured out if I have the time.

K

[Shibby]

I'm not saying to give up at all. Just you sent the letter, you shouldn't expect her to come running back.