Christmas party

[meat12]

I got this in an email from someone at my company and thought it was real at first lol : :D


Subject: Christmas party


FROM: Patty Lewis, Human Resources Director

TO: All Employees

DATE: October 01, 2005

RE: Christmas Party


I'm happy to inform you that the company Christmas Party will take place on December 23, starting at noon in the private function room at the Grill House. There will be a cash bar and plenty of drinks! We'll have a small ban d playing traditional carols...feel free to sing along. And don't be surprised if our CEO shows up dressed as Santa Claus! A Christmas tree will be lit at 1:00pm. Exchange of gifts among employees can be done at that time; however, no gift should be over $10.00 to make the giving of gifts easy for everyone's pockets. This gathering is only for employees! Our CEO will make a special announcement at that time!

Merry Christmas to you and your family.

Patty

[meat12]

FROM: Patty Lewis, Human Resources Director

TO: All Employees

DATE: October 02, 2005

RE: Holiday Party

In no way was yesterday's memo intended to exclude our Jewish employees. We recognize that Chanukah is an important holiday, which often coincides with Christmas, though unfortunately not this year. However, from now on we're calling it our "Holiday Party." The same policy applies to any other employees who are not Christians or those still celebrating Reconciliation Day. There will be no Christmas tree present. No Christmas carols sung. We will have other types of music for your enjoyment. Happy now?

Happy Holidays to you and your family.

Patty

[meat12]

FROM: Patty Lewis, Human Resources Director

TO: All Employees

DATE: October 03, 2005

RE: Holiday Party

Regarding the note I received from a member of Alcoholics Anonymous requesting a non-drinking table . you didn't sign your name. I'm happy to accommodate this request, but if I put a sign on a table that reads, "AA Only"; you wouldn't be anonymous anymore. How am I supposed to handle this?
Somebody?

Forget about the gifts exchange, no gifts exchange are allowed since the union members feel that $10.00 is too much money and executives believe $10.00 is a little chintzy. NO GIFTS EXCHANGE WILL BE ALLOWED.

Patty

[meat12]

FROM: Patty Lewis, Human Resources Director

To: All Employees

DATE: October 04, 2005

RE: Holiday Party


What a diverse group we are! I had no idea that December 20 begins the Muslim holy month of Ramadan, which forbids eating and drinking during daylight hours. There goes the party! Seriousl y, we can appreciate how a luncheon at this time of year does not accommodate our Muslim employees' beliefs. Perhaps the Grill House can hold off on serving your meal until the end of the party- or else package everything for you to take it home in little foil doggy baggy. Will that work? Meanwhile, I've arranged for members of Weight Watchers to sit farthest from the dessert buffet and pregnant women will get the table closest to the restrooms. Gays are allowed to sit with each other. Lesbians do not have to sit with Gay men, each will have their own table. Yes, there will be flower arrangement for the Gay men's table. To the person asking permission to cross dress, no cross-dressing allowed though. We will have booster seats for short people. Low-fat food will be available for those on a diet. We cannot control the salt used in the food we suggest for those people with high blood pressure to taste first. There will be fresh fruits as dessert for Diabetics, the restaurant cannot supply "No Sugar" desserts. Sorry! Did I miss anything?!?!?

Patty

[meat12]

FROM: Patty Lewis, Human Resources Director

TO: All Fucking Employees

DATE: October 05, 2005

RE: The Fucking Holiday Party


Vegetarian pricks I've had it with you people!!! We're going to keep this party at the Grill House whether you like it or not, so you can sit quietly at the table furthest from the "grill of death," as you so quaintly put it, and you'll get your f**king salad bar, including organic tomatoes. But you know, tomatoes have feelings, too. They scream when you slice them. I've heard them scream. I'm hearing them scream right NOW! I hope you all h ave a rotten holiday! Drive drunk and die.

The Bitch from HELL!!!!!!!!

[meat12]

FROM: Joan Bishop, Acting Human Resources Director

DATE: October 06, 2003

RE: Patty Lewis and Holiday Party


I'm sure I speak for all of us in wishing Patty Lewis a speedy recovery and I'll continue to forward your cards to her. In the meantime, management has decided to cancel our Holiday Party and give everyone the afternoon of the 23rd off with full pay.

Happy Holidays!

[spidey]

That's about the size of it too. Political correctness is ruining this country.

It's amazing to me that in a country where 85% of the population identifies themselves as Christian, people are so terrified they will be labeled insensitive (or racist) that they can't bring themselves to display anything that could be remotely construed as "christian". Minority religions (that means everything else) have no such hang-up. They can put up minorrahs (sp?) or symbols from Islam, or even Wicca (a religion antithetical to christianity) and that is OK, even encouraged in the name of diversity. Try putting up a cross or even a non-religious icon like a santa or some reigndeer though. All of a sudden, we can't "promote one religion over another". I call BULLSHIT.

I keep hoping this is just some crazy fad that will burn itself out when people realize what an ASS they are being. When I was a kid, this was simply not an issue. If you didn't celebrate christmas, fine but we saw no reason to punish the 85% majority because some minority people might get their panties in a wad.

[Shibby]

I'm with you Spiey, our kindess is turning into a weakness. It's people like "these" that turns all those warm hearts to ice.

[meat12]

I agree too, It's gotten way out of hand

[BBAddict]

That's why I say screw political correctness-I'm just gonna say what I think and deal with it.

[ROCKETW19]

That's why I say screw political correctness-I'm just gonna say what I think and deal with it.

:bravonew: im with you

[Timma]

That shit's pretty funny.

-the Jewish, Muslim, vegetarian, recovering alcoholic. :D

[njjuicer]

fuckin camy bastard aint that fuckin great you cant have apic of santa up but your a racist if u dotn want to hear about fuckin qwanza !!!!!

[pierced one]

i hate it. I have to be so politically correct so i dont hurt anyones feelings. It is so fucking worthless, if i want to be sensitive to someones needs i would give my girl a little more attention. I would like to know what memo i missed that said all current employees turn into bitches and it is ok to now start whinning when i ask them to do their job........sorry just a little rant to add to the mix(14 hours of work, with 2 now shows and 3 late employees) FUCK ALL OF THE POLITICAL BULLSHIT.

That email followed my day perfectly. :thumbsdow

[hitmansb]

I'm at the point where I'm ready to tell the anti-Christian whiners to go fuck themselves. Don't like it? Don't come to the party...don't look at my decorations...go to your own space and do whatever it is you do to appease whatever God you believe in. I'm not going to suppress my beliefs to appease anyone.