I lil advice needed

[Mr I]

You know when someone pisses you off, on the street you walk the other way but sometimes in life you can't either because its work or family, what do you do?

[mofo]

I just keep communication to a minimal. Only talk/meet/work together if you need to otherwise just go about your business. This only really works if both parties are understanding of hostile feelings because if it's one-sided, then you open the doors of awkwardness.

[wnabeabeast]

If it's already done and you are home safe and sound just forget about it but if he is gonna come back tomorrow and bug you some more I say have a little talk with that person.

[Mr I]

good points both, its an extended family member and a birthday coming up, guys brother is with my sister in law, the guy is a total tool and was really rude the first time I met him, rude to me in an intelectual way, dissrespectful but I bit my lip because it was with family. Now its sister in laws boyfreinds birthday and his twatty brother is going to be there.

He'll no doubt say something wankerish and I then have two choices, bite the lip and stew or make a scene, either way I'm the bad guy or will be made to feel that way. Also if I don't go I'm the bad guy.

You know when you just can't win ha!

Sounds daft I know but the Mrs family are so tight and in each others pockets they don't miss a trick and I then have to live with the results, bit like an old Italian set up. I think I'll just claim I double booked and takes myself out of it

[wnabeabeast]

Actually you can put him in his place without causing a seen just do what he does to you right back at him.
I'm great at that. :D

[mofo]

the Mrs family are so tight and in each others pockets they don't miss a trick and I then have to live with the results, bit like an old Italian set up. I think I'll just claim I double booked and takes myself out of it

i know exactly what you mean. my family is the same way. we are one huge family, we don't consider other people extended unless they are really far out there (like my mom's cousin's husband's third cousins would begin the "extended family" title). but i think it's just best to let him do what he pleases because if you don't say anything, sure enough everyone else will realize what as ass he is and if you do say something, you'll be seen as the ass.

what i've seen from personal experience is if you haven't earned your "keep" in everyone's eyes, it's best to let it go.

[dfc]

if its not work put him in his place,I had an issue with my sisters bf and tried my best to not get into it with him but he kept on and kept on so I beat his ass,it caused a fuss in my family but now when I see him he doesnt have anything smart to say. By no means Im I saying do that but tell him u dont need to deal with that bs that its family and theres no need for it. If he doesnt stop ,stop him.

[Bouncer]

never let anyone talk down to you or make you feel stupid. you cant allow it. you need to look him right in the eye and ask him what the deal is.

then again, i dont know the situation. it could be you that is taking it the wrong way.

[Turbo3000]

never let anyone talk down to you or make you feel stupid. you cant allow it. you need to look him right in the eye and ask him what the deal is.

then again, i dont know the situation. it could be you that is taking it the wrong way.

:clapback:

WWBD.

Great motto.

[Mr I]

Guys guys lol! your such a great bunch, but seriousely if it comes to it I'm not backward about coming forwards and telling people the way it is to their face, thats not the problem.

It boils down to this, I don't like the guy, private school educated, elitest arrogant attitude that outwardly judges others and all he is with that private education is a recruitment consultant who opens the door for ladies and acts posh as if it rises him above others, total failure in my book.

I'll be more specific, on that night I drive with my wife to pick him and his girlfreind up to drive them to my sister in laws boyfreinds birthday, on the way he's talking property market and cars no probs, we get out the car and when I stand up he's like "oh so you go to the gym a bit then", I'm sat opposite him at the table and one of the questions he asks in front of everyone is "so do you take steroids then" you know what I'm saying guys? is that the sort of thing you would ask someone on a first meeting getting to know? I would never say to someone do you snort coke or smoke weed, nonna my fucking business none at all. Next thing that left me pissed off was he starts talking about where I'm from (northern England) and says "it it true the women are easy there?" now my mum and sisters which he knows from earlier conversation are from there so I say no different, he's like well that not my experience. His brothers sat next to him who's birthday it is and not saying much but when the women go to the toilet together like they do these punks are commenting on all the women walking past, childish shit.

The problem is family and how to deal with it, I would like to just avoid the twat rather than be exposed to something that might well get me angry and ruin the atmosphere. Thing is sis in law has a kid to his brother and they will hopefully marry at some point and I won't dodge that event but thats big enough to get some escape. This bday is in a small house.

I've told sis in law sorry but I'm up north that weekend visiting family, the wife's kicked off about it but fuck it, I made my mind up now, life's too short to suffer fools and they'll (wife's family) will just make life difficult for her if I say something and I think it would leave me pissed off if I went and didn't say something, so this is the best way out of it.

"sorry I double booked and have plans" done.

[Mr I]

never let anyone talk down to you or make you feel stupid. you cant allow it. you need to look him right in the eye and ask him what the deal is.

then again, i dont know the situation. it could be you that is taking it the wrong way.

Agree completely, I have more qualifications and a way bigger bench:thumup:

The bloke's a cock plain and simple

[Mr I]

if its not work put him in his place,I had an issue with my sisters bf and tried my best to not get into it with him but he kept on and kept on so I beat his ass,it caused a fuss in my family but now when I see him he doesnt have anything smart to say. By no means Im I saying do that but tell him u dont need to deal with that bs that its family and theres no need for it. If he doesnt stop ,stop him.

:rofl::rofl::rofl:

[Mr I]

i know exactly what you mean. my family is the same way. we are one huge family, we don't consider other people extended unless they are really far out there (like my mom's cousin's husband's third cousins would begin the "extended family" title). but i think it's just best to let him do what he pleases because if you don't say anything, sure enough everyone else will realize what as ass he is and if you do say something, you'll be seen as the ass.

what i've seen from personal experience is if you haven't earned your "keep" in everyone's eyes, it's best to let it go.

Yeah kinda like that, I earned my keep alright and the family think highly of me so they all keep telling me, especially when I lost my job the other year and took a menial one straight off instead of being too proud, they love that, also I'm old fashioned, engaged and then married the lady instead of having a kid straight off like some of the others then splitting up. I just don't think I can put a false face on, I'm not good at that, and at the end of the day its his brothers birthday, so if I can't go there and be nice, what exactly am I going for? there's no worthy point.

[mofo]

also I'm old fashioned, engaged and then married the lady instead of having a kid straight off

i like how the norm is now having kids out of wedlock. i mean, sure if you want to do it then by all means do so. but don't think of it as the new norm. i guess i'm "old fashioned"

but i think you made a good choice in "double booking". i would definitely do the same. i hate people who ask private questions straight off the bat. whoever gave them the idea that it's perfectly fine is just stupid.

[dna9488]

Guys guys lol! your such a great bunch, but seriousely if it comes to it I'm not backward about coming forwards and telling people the way it is to their face, thats not the problem.

It boils down to this, I don't like the guy, private school educated, elitest arrogant attitude that outwardly judges others and all he is with that private education is a recruitment consultant who opens the door for ladies and acts posh as if it rises him above others, total failure in my book.

I'll be more specific, on that night I drive with my wife to pick him and his girlfreind up to drive them to my sister in laws boyfreinds birthday, on the way he's talking property market and cars no probs, we get out the car and when I stand up he's like "oh so you go to the gym a bit then", I'm sat opposite him at the table and one of the questions he asks in front of everyone is "so do you take steroids then" you know what I'm saying guys? is that the sort of thing you would ask someone on a first meeting getting to know? I would never say to someone do you snort coke or smoke weed, nonna my fucking business none at all. Next thing that left me pissed off was he starts talking about where I'm from (northern England) and says "it it true the women are easy there?" now my mum and sisters which he knows from earlier conversation are from there so I say no different, he's like well that not my experience. His brothers sat next to him who's birthday it is and not saying much but when the women go to the toilet together like they do these punks are commenting on all the women walking past, childish shit.

The problem is family and how to deal with it, I would like to just avoid the twat rather than be exposed to something that might well get me angry and ruin the atmosphere. Thing is sis in law has a kid to his brother and they will hopefully marry at some point and I won't dodge that event but thats big enough to get some escape. This bday is in a small house.

I've told sis in law sorry but I'm up north that weekend visiting family, the wife's kicked off about it but fuck it, I made my mind up now, life's too short to suffer fools and they'll (wife's family) will just make life difficult for her if I say something and I think it would leave me pissed off if I went and didn't say something, so this is the best way out of it.

"sorry I double booked and have plans" done.

Well man, guy definitely sounds like some snob thats waiting for an ass kicking.

If someone was treating me like that, I would pull him to the side where no one is looking and just talk to him. Straight up and use an aggressive tone.

"I don't appreciate the way you have been talking to me. I believe you have disrespected me and my family on many occasions and I do not appreciate that."

Sounds like this guy has been under your skin a few times. No need to keep quiet, you need to pull him aside and talk to him.