I have weird commitment probs

[the art of war]

Whether it's a marriage or life-term girlfriend, it's the same vulnerability.

yeah i get that - normally about a month in I start to feel very controlled and I find myself making more and more reasons to get out and go be with my boys or whatever, fuck man is it a bad thing to be like this ? Like I don't know if this is just how I'm wired and thats that and i shouldn't sweat it or is this something I Should work on? Can you imagine / what would it look like if you could - if you hadn't gotten married / kids etc... more along marriage, i love kids would love to adopt a child at some point when my life is stable.... 30 years from now at the rate im going :(

[alwaysgrowing]

yeah i get that - normally about a month in I start to feel very controlled and I find myself making more and more reasons to get out and go be with my boys or whatever, fuck man is it a bad thing to be like this ? Like I don't know if this is just how I'm wired and thats that and i shouldn't sweat it or is this something I Should work on? Can you imagine / what would it look like if you could - if you hadn't gotten married / kids etc... more along marriage, i love kids would love to adopt a child at some point when my life is stable.... 30 years from now at the rate im going :(

It seems almost as if you are searching for the meaning of life, as well as the oath you should take. Chop down the bushes in your way (pun intended) and make your own path to meaning. Don't feel the pressure to follow society. I have seen you say that you are not intelligent (or not as much as your family is), but I see you as having some wit about yourself. Street smarts is just as important as book smarts.

[the art of war]

It seems almost as if you are searching for the meaning of life, as well as the oath you should take. Chop down the bushes in your way (pun intended) and make your own path to meaning. Don't feel the pressure to follow society. I have seen you say that you are not intelligent (or not as much as your family is), but I see you as having some wit about yourself. Street smarts is just as important as book smarts.

for me to be smart in this family means phd from harvard - overall ironically i have the highest iq (yes i did the 16 hours of testing for learning disabilities, legit testing not some online IQ test) - but I just have never been able to put it to use - books etc. And I think you hit the nail on the head bro, ever since that fucking car hit me, I've been getting progressively frustrated which inevitably does depress me - just trying to keep your head up is tough - but when you have fucked up every relationship , and don't have a clue wtf you are doing with life .... fair enough bro, you hit that shit square.

[alwaysgrowing]

for me to be smart in this family means phd from harvard - overall ironically i have the highest iq (yes i did the 16 hours of testing for learning disabilities, legit testing not some online IQ test) - but I just have never been able to put it to use - books etc. And I think you hit the nail on the head bro, ever since that fucking car hit me, I've been getting progressively frustrated which inevitably does depress me - just trying to keep your head up is tough - but when you have fucked up every relationship , and don't have a clue wtf you are doing with life .... fair enough bro, you hit that shit square.

I tend to screw up any type of relationshipI have, be it sexual or other, for I tend to be cold and calculating. Often, I do care. But my opinion is always to suck it up and push onward. So I understand where you are coming from.

And as for being intelligent, I feel that it is a reason I often have trouble relating to others. We will have a nautral knack for seeing things, for comprehending things that others may not. I never could grasp this concept completely until recently. If you are not being challenged in a relationship (if you are much like me as I am presupposing) then you look for a new conquest. Some may say it is empty, but if its fun and you enjoy it, then do it.

I think (correct me if I am wrong) that you are making yourself miserable worrying about it. That is the type of thoughts that will drive you back to the depths from which you have risen from. Have fun, and if something comes along, so be it. If not, keeping adding notches to your bedpost

[the art of war]

Good shit bro - I think honestly it's been the bed rest and leg from the accident that is causing this shit - going on 4 weeks of bed rest and it honestly drives me fucking luney tunes, too much time to think - I've been reading a lot - but all i end up doing is scheming on how to make money and shit - boredom is devil dude. I'll end up depressed and thinking exactly as you said - the wrong roads from the past. Luckily I'm moving around more, and spirits are up - all in all I feel real good and I'm blessed to have the support of the parents until i get back on my feet (really until i find the job i want, got enough to just move out and live and all but I need to be making money or im jus pissin away savings..

[alwaysgrowing]

Good shit bro - I think honestly it's been the bed rest and leg from the accident that is causing this shit - going on 4 weeks of bed rest and it honestly drives me fucking luney tunes, too much time to think - I've been reading a lot - but all i end up doing is scheming on how to make money and shit - boredom is devil dude. I'll end up depressed and thinking exactly as you said - the wrong roads from the past. Luckily I'm moving around more, and spirits are up - all in all I feel real good and I'm blessed to have the support of the parents until i get back on my feet (really until i find the job i want, got enough to just move out and live and all but I need to be making money or im jus pissin away savings..

Having parents that will support you in all manners is a wonderful thing. Once I was out on my own and back in school when I decided law school was my future. I spoke with my parents about moving back home once my lease was up. I felt it was in my best interests not to piss away $10000+ a year on my own when I could be saving it for law school. There support has helped me grow to be the person I am. Cherish it bro

[alwaysgrowing]

On another note, while out on my own, I made some not so great decisions (none that I regret for I LEARNED) which included cutting off my parents for severla years. I have made up for it the past few

[the art of war]

my parents are good people dude - no doubt about it - they have had a lot of hard times with me, since I was a young kid I had some very drastic problems happen to me , turned ugly. But I moved out originally at 17 - and have been in and out since then - I love being on my own - but reality says I need that extra advice,, some areas I just need to grow and I'm willing to admit that as emasculated as I feel :fight:

[alwaysgrowing]

Urban Dictionary: commitment hahah #6

Commitment is like puss. You get a taste, think its okay then BAM! it sucks. Really, Really sucks. Avoid if possible.

[the art of war]

LOL ! that's perfect bro.

[alwaysgrowing]

Just for you AOW. Check #5

Urban Dictionary: commitment

5. Commitment 1 thumb up
What crazy women try to trap unsuspecting men into. Women often use manipulating words and their sweet vag to get it. Having children is also an option. Bring your own condoms, get in, get off, and get out to avoid.

Jenna wanted commitment from MArk and trapped him by poking holes in the condom.

[edvedr]

Do you know what you need out of life to be truly happy?

[the art of war]

Just for you AOW. Check #5

Urban Dictionary: commitment

5. Commitment 1 thumb up
What crazy women try to trap unsuspecting men into. Women often use manipulating words and their sweet vag to get it. Having children is also an option. Bring your own condoms, get in, get off, and get out to avoid.

Jenna wanted commitment from MArk and trapped him by poking holes in the condom.

that's scary - like i said 2 times down that road - no more, no fucking way.

Do you know what you need out of life to be truly happy?

I can rattle off a list of things that most people say this makes you happy that makes you happy - do I Personally know ? Nah, if I had found it - I would never have let go of it. Being content with who I am would be a huge start, not worrying about losing my savings since finding legal work has become a nightmare (when you have a fucking 5 year blank list on an application it really doesn't help) - I don't know man, I would love to just get my hands dirty, make an honest living, eat sleep ,, juice , live. Shit if someone gave me that chance I'd take my savings and move - I'm very fed up with being here.

I've talked with my cousins and uncles / aunts in england - frankly their is not a ton out there and that sort of move would be huge and a certain risk. What do you think the you need out of life to be truly happy bro ? Seriously - this stuff has been floating in my head for a long time now.

[ROCKETW19]

sorry bro i only read the first post or two but I already know what it is. You are a young man what are young men suposed to do. mate with as many bitches as we can. it simple nature. I was the same way as you but I didnt even try and have a girlfriend or any of that silly stuff. I simply wanted to concur the next bitch, that was it my whole purpose in life. find a chick make he mine then find another. but dont worrie sooner or later you will find the one. in the mean time have fun

[Bouncer]

you could always try men.