My awkward as fuck story

[Bouncer]

Everyday I walk my dogs around the neighborhood and pretty much take the same route. I walk 1 dog at a time because walking the 2 of them together is a tangled up nightmare. Anyway I walk the first dog and then go back the same route with the second dog. Almost everyday when I walk past a particular area with the second dog there is a 90lb Asian lady (I'd guess Vietnamese) but I don't know. Anyway, she stands in my path with her little dog and gives me weird compliments by saying them to her dog. So I'll walk up and she'll be like, "he's nice strong man you be nice and don't bark", "he's a good and handsome man you be nice". She does it about 3 times per week after I've walked by with the first dog she's basically waiting for me. To add to the weirdness she's always wearing a see through lace robe with a half top and tiny little shorts underneath. I don't know if she's a fucken nut case or a prostitute or what. I don't want to be mean to her but it gets annoying having to stand there awkwardly waiting for her to get out of my way. I have absolutely zero interest in stick figure women and my body language has been pretty clear but she doesn't seem to be able to take a hint. Weird mother fuckers in this world.

[chuckz28]

Time to walk a different route. She's masturbating to you bro.

[Chadd77]

Sounds like a perfect match for traps!

[TrapsBrah]

Sounds like a perfect match for traps!

Lol you wish.

[dna9488]

Just whip out your dick bouncer and have her go to town on it. You know you secretly want to hit that

[piratex]

Change your route up & see if she pops up on it.

[Bouncer]

Change your route up & see if she pops up on it.

I doubt she'll pop up. She only shows up when I walk by her window after the first dog walk. Just blows my mind how people can't understand body language and facial expression.

[Scrumhalf]

Just blows my mind how people can't understand body language and facial expression.

I bet she's thinking the exact same thing.

[Keiser]

Why not just fuck her?

[Bouncer]

I bet she's thinking the exact same thing.

You lost me.

[Scrumhalf]

You lost me.

She's thinking, *I'm out here half naked every day and this guy doesn't seem to get it. How can someone be so clueless!"

Lol...

[Bouncer]

Maybe if I act gay that will stop her from being weird without offending her.

I think today I'll walk by with my hand swinging and say "such a glorious day" in the gayest tone I can muster.

[chuckz28]

Lol there you go, have some fun with it.

[Bouncer]

I'm not sure the pitbull sells the "I'm gay" vibe very well though. :D

[chuckz28]

Just say to her he attracts all the hot guys or something.