cheating

[UNSTABLE]

I have done it in the past, my wife and I just made it apart of out marriage. Open relationship, it saves on divorce costs lol

[Liftingchic]

never have cheated and yes i have been cheated on before... yes people make mistakes but that doesn't mean i have to forgive you and let you back into my life ..cause i am 90% a cheater once will always cheat again.( a lesson i had to learn). FOR EVERY ACTION ..THERE IS A REACTION if you want to go cheating then i don't want to be with you.. yes i will forgive you but i won't forget so we can just be friends...

Originally posted by lilgreeneyes
have never cheated, but have been cheated on. i dont have the time to waste trying to find a good guy any more. i pride myself on being one of the normal non phyco types, and all my male friends tell me they wish their g/fs were more like me. but finding a good guy who wants everything im willing to give and not abuse it, is a waste of time. there is no more out there. they have all been ruined by crazy fucked-in-the-head chicks

Well said lilgreen..... seems like there really aren't anymore good ones out there..

[VeggieLifterGal]

Originally posted by K409G
I've been with my girlfriend since the sophmore year of high school. Im now almost 22 and will eventually marry her. Yes, I have cheated. It does make me feel shitty, but I think I needed the other experiences while im young so I won't feel the need to do it when I get married. I dont want anyone else and I dont do it anymore, but I dont regret the other experiences either. She was the first, too. Maybe thats why I felt I needed to do my thing. The test sure doesnt help either.

I can relate to what you're saying. Experimenting is important. I was worried about needing to experience a lot of hooking up while I'm young (I'm 21), but I found the guy I want to marry already, too. So rather than cheat on my boy - who I love immensely - I broke up with him. He's awesome, he totally understood and instead of being apart we worked out an "understanding" since he was about to go out of the country for 9 months. Basically, no sex with other people. There are other details, but they're pretty private.

I couldn't wait until I felt like I had experienced enough to feel like I won't miss out if I became monogamous. That was my goal. I very recently reached it and quit messing around when it got to feeling like same shit/different day. I knew it would never cease to be fun, but I figured there would come a time when I could say, okay been there/done that. It is hard with so much temptation around - because I have to be totally celibate rather than just monogamous - but I know it's more than worth it. Since it's strictly a matter of keeping my hormones in check at this point. I can't wait until he comes back. He's so hot, much hotter than the guys I see at school here (and they aren't bad at all).

I'd never want to put him through that kind of pain. I've imagined what it would feel like if he did it to me. I've had nightmares about finding out that he had an affair and that alone felt absolutely horrible.

I've also been working on cultivating a happiness with the things I have in general. I think a lot of the reason people cheat is what I'd call "Grass is greener syndrome." But if what you have is truly, objectively The Shit - whether that's your sig. other or some other thing - all you need to do is realize it. I look at my friends and see their relationships, or see them getting with married/committed guys, or see them getting screwed over emotionally, or just see them with guys that just aren't their perfect match...and then I think of how good I have it. And it kills whatever natural curiosity I might have had. Because I can look around and know I got the best there is.

When I've got alcohol running through me and my sex drive is high, I just recite this quote in my head or write it on my hand: "The pain of discipline is nothing compared to the pain of regret."

I envy all of you who can have sex with the people you love right now!


Oh okay...I should really add one thing here: according to this amazing boy of mine, its not cheating if I kiss other girls.
:cool:

[Nicole]

Originally posted by VeggieLifterGal

I envy all of you who can have sex with the people you love right now!


Oh okay...I should really add one thing here: according to this amazing boy of mine, its not cheating if I kiss other girls.
:cool:

I envy them too...


hehehe I love that he lets you kiss girls.. lol!!

[ixoye66]

VLG well put...You know when your in love when you can make that kind of commitment and stay true. Alot of people do have that "grass is greener" mentality, and what they find is very dissapointing.

koodoe'sto ya veggie lifter gal.

[Trojanmn2]

Originally posted by VeggieLifterGal

I'd never want to put him through that kind of pain. I've imagined what it would feel like if he did it to me. I've had nightmares about finding out that he had an affair and that alone felt absolutely horrible.

I've also been working on cultivating a happiness with the things I have in general. I think a lot of the reason people cheat is what I'd call "Grass is greener syndrome." But if what you have is truly, objectively The Shit - whether that's your sig. other or some other thing - all you need to do is realize it. I look at my friends and see their relationships, or see them getting with married/committed guys, or see them getting screwed over emotionally, or just see them with guys that just aren't their perfect match...and then I think of how good I have it. And it kills whatever natural curiosity I might have had. Because I can look around and know I got the best there is.

When I've got alcohol running through me and my sex drive is high, I just recite this quote in my head or write it on my hand: "The pain of discipline is nothing compared to the pain of regret."

:cool:

Beautiful, I like that last statement very much. Very powerful indeed. Do you ever assure your man how you feel about him? How often? Is there ever a time that when you say this, you fear for rejection or fear of looking emotional and weak? And does your man do the same thing and fears how you will see him being emotional? And if so, is it alot ? or just right?

[checkoutmyrap]

I always said that I would never cheat swore up and down that I would never do and never did until I got fed up with the fact that my girl kept telling me that we would eventually have sex and it has been 3 years don't aks me how I lasted so long but love makes you do crazy things, Then it happened girl cam along and offerd and who am I to say no. I mean shit its been 3 1/2 years and my girl telling me well it has to be perfect. Well Valentines day was the last straw it was more then perfect and she came up with some story for not doing it.

[BiggerStronger]

Dude - She's screwing someone else. lol j/k bro.

That's a tough situation...All I can say is if you're not happy with your relationship let her know how you feel and see what else is out there. If you do indeed love her that much set yourself straight and have discipline like veggie said.

BTW - I love that quote.

[Froggie]

I've cheated once, even though we were broke up for 5 months I still feel like it was wrong, b/c i loved him, "I reget it everyday now, b/c i lost him, and he doesn't even know i cheated on him, it was the man up stairs that made that decision to take him away for what i did to him, there's not a day that goes by that i can think i can forgive myself, i've learn the hard way, break up or no break up cheating is wrong when you love someone, so if you ever get the chance to cheat, take my advice and "don't do it..."

[VeggieLifterGal]

Originally posted by Trojanmn2
Beautiful, I like that last statement very much. Very powerful indeed. Do you ever assure your man how you feel about him? How often? Is there ever a time that when you say this, you fear for rejection or fear of looking emotional and weak? And does your man do the same thing and fears how you will see him being emotional? And if so, is it alot ? or just right?

very interesting questions. Yes, I should tell him more. I tell him I love him all the time and lately I've been trying to tell him that i really admire and respect him, but often I do have a hard time telling him how I feel about him because I do feel like I look weak and emotional and/or cheesy. I'm workin on it, but he understands me and knows how I feel about him... he says i say it enough but i wanna be as good as he is to me about it.

He tells me all the time that he loves me and that I'm the most important thing in his life. He's amazing..

what made you think of asking that?

[redMachchick]

I've never cheated....and never will!

[Puddles]

Originally posted by redMachchick
We don't cheat, we would rather play with everyone together!!!:D

Dittto.

There's a thrill about being with someone different and we enjoy experiencing that together as friends.

When it comes to making love though, it's all about the mind and heart, I only make love with my husband, our other encounters are just for fun...lots of fun! :D

[Mr. Shoulders]

I love my wife...she's more important to me than anyone else....why destroy a great thing...

[GunzInCali]

I have a hard time being faithful and the one time I was faithful, I was cheated on. I just live life day by day and make my decisions as I need to.