Just when I thought things were great...

[The_Grinder]

...my girl gave back the ring last night. It was a huge shock to me. We had just moved into a house, and I thought things were going great. Apparently her feelings have been changing over the past few months. Right now I am staying at my parents' while she figures things out. I can hear it in her voice though that things really are different. I'm about 99% sure its over. I have been dumped before. Hell, I even posted about it. But this is different. This is the girl I honestly saw having my children. I've been up all night. Threw up about 4 times. I cant eat anything, and I can barely hold down water.

I just cant come to terms with this. I was this girl's whole world when we met. We had such a spark and connection. I think things just got too boring for her. After you move in together and get out of college, things begin to settle down, and it aint a fuckin love novel every night.

[FitnessBrat]

I'm sorry Grinder :(....

[mormonmuscle]

...my girl gave back the ring last night. It was a huge shock to me. We had just moved into a house, and I thought things were going great. Apparently her feelings have been changing over the past few months. Right now I am staying at my parents' while she figures things out. I can hear it in her voice though that things really are different. I'm about 99% sure its over. I have been dumped before. Hell, I even posted about it. But this is different. This is the girl I honestly saw having my children. I've been up all night. Threw up about 4 times. I cant eat anything, and I can barely hold down water.

I just cant come to terms with this. I was this girl's whole world when we met. We had such a spark and connection. I think things just got too boring for her. After you move in together and get out of college, things begin to settle down, and it aint a fuckin love novel every night.

I'm sorry to hear that man, I wouldn't wish that crap on anyone. My wife of 8 years thought she would be better off without me earlier this year, and the thought of losing my wife (my best friend) and not being able to see my 3 kids when ever I wanted tore me apart. It was a complete shock to me, but fortunately we were able to get our situation resolved and we are in a stronger relationship now. I can only hope this serves as inspiration to you, and I hope the best for you.

[Timma]

I feel for ya man. Know how you feel. Just keep your head up and take things day by day. It will all get better from here.

[Bouncer]

real sorry to hear it bro.

nothing i can say to make you feel better but just keep your head up and know that thing will get better.

[The_Grinder]

Thanks for the kind words everyone. I am forcing myself to be as tough as possible and not call her or show up to see her. She said she needs space so I am going to give it to her. She even just texted to make sure I'm ok. I wanted to send her a two page message back telling her how beautiful and great she was. I toughed it out and just said, "I'm fine", and nothing else. Might sound easy enough but thats a hell of an accomplishment with how I am feeling.

I figure by just leaving her completely alone I can let her find out what she REALLY wants without being concerned with what I want. If she decides she wants to be with me, it will be her decision, and not something I said. If the decision is no, then I know it wasnt meant to be anyway.

All this on my day off too...

[Timma]

That's exactly what you have to do. Just keep everything plain and simple and just stay away. It's hard, but you'll be better off in the long run.

If things don't work out just remember there are plenty of fish in the sea. Plus you're still young man you have so much more living to do. It's all a learning experience, so take everything you learned from this and use it for future endeavors. If you ever need to chat hit me up on PM. I'm more than willing to help out with this stuff. I knew I should have been a damn therapist. lol

[Bouncer]

just a reminder also. be careful what you say here because she may be reading it. she knows you post here right?

[Timma]

just a reminder also. be careful what you say here because she may be reading it. she knows you post here right?

Ah good point. Hence why i'm the only one who knows i post here. There's crazies out there. lol

[NYCmitch25]

fuck, sorry brother... just hang in there it will get better.

[The_Grinder]

just a reminder also. be careful what you say here because she may be reading it. she knows you post here right?

yeah she does. dont worry i have nothing bad to say about her. she always treated me great and i love her. she can read all she wants, but i seriously doubt she will

[Bouncer]

yeah she does. dont worry i have nothing bad to say about her. she always treated me great and i love her. she can read all she wants, but i seriously doubt she will

what i mean is, don't say something she can use to control the situation etc..

[Shibby]

This shit always sucks Grinder. I actually see a lot of similar situations I have been through. What is so hard and frustrating is completely understanding where you are in life and what you want. It is so much harder than most people express to find the same thing. Most women you meet will think they are in that place and truly believe it, but for the most part are only 70% there. They have the idea of what they ideally want but have not taken the time to understand how much fairy tale actually makes it to real life. You can be as strong as you need to be around some people, but don't ignore what you feel. Feel it, embrace it and understand it. With out doing that you will have unanswerable questions forever.

[The_Grinder]

.....They have the idea of what they ideally want but have not taken the time to understand how much fairy tale actually makes it to real life. .

Most dead on statement I have heard in a long time. This is EXACTLY what happened with us. The first 8 or 9 months were fairy tale shit. Little surprises every night, having to sneak her out of her parents' house late, trips to the beach, going out with friends, etc. I pop the question, we both get out of school, and we get into the "real world" where we actually have to work full time jobs. All of the sudden the fairy tale is gone and apparently thats what she fell in love with.

[Shibby]

It's always the same. We all want the fairy tail of being in love, but in reality what is great is someone to come home to that you love coming home to. Everything else is just a fantasy. Even those people who think they find the perfect harmony of a relationship realize life is life and having someone that you can laugh at and laugh at you is what is perfect. "Imperfection is perfection". (Some famous artist said it but I can't remember who).