What should I do

[Bouncer]

i dont know shit about being a parent besides anything other then dogs so just ignore me. lol. fuck kids, hate them to high hell. :D

[FitnessBrat]

Rocket knows whats going on I just haven't said anything on here. I have court this week over her I hired an Attorney spent a shit load of cash trying to get full custody of her instead of joint custody as it stands. Her mother has developed a horrible substance abuse problem with alcohol. Her grades have dropped. School reports say she day dreams a lot can't stay focused she was straight A-B student. Says she worries about her mother a lot. Now she is listening to rap music which I like rap but the line between entertainment and being reality with kids gets blurred easily and I know this stuff has a lot of influence on kids it did me when i was young. She started throwing up south end gang signs the other day I bout fell over

Obviously I don't know anything about KY, but I do know it's very hard to get full custody of a child. I'm not saying it's not warranted, but the system would like for both parents to parent, ideally. They will give your ex every opportunity to make things right, most likely - and hopefully she takes them up on the offer.

When I left my ex-husband, he was an alcoholic. My daughter grew up very fast in her time with him. She too, worried all the time. It sucks. No child should have to be placed in those situations. If she isn't already, get your daughter into counseling. They have to learn that adult problems are for the adults. They can not control what's happening, and they can't take responsibility for it, either.

If you don't like what you're daughter is listening to, don't allow it. She's 10, there's no reason she HAS to listen to Eminem or whomever you don't find appropriate. You can't control what she hears 24/7, but you can control it when she's with you. Talk to her about WHY you aren't allowing things, WHY gang signs aren't "appropriate" etc. Communication is key. Especially when so much is going on in her life. :(

[FitnessBrat]

i dont know shit about being a parent besides anything other then dogs so just ignore me. lol.

Best advice you've ever given :thumup:

[dago]

Obviously I don't know anything about KY, but I do know it's very hard to get full custody of a child. I'm not saying it's not warranted, but the system would like for both parents to parent, ideally. They will give your ex every opportunity to make things right, most likely - and hopefully she takes them up on the offer.

Thats exactly what they are saying to me they want her to get help and if she doesn't follow through then she will stay with me for good. I wangt her to get help but still feel she should be with me full time either way. I can provide for her better period.

[FitnessBrat]

Thats exactly what they are saying to me they want her to get help and if she doesn't follow through then she will stay with me for good. I wangt her to get help but still feel she should be with me full time either way. I can provide for her better period.

Just always keep in the back of your mind that despite the "wrong" she is doing, she is still your daughters mother and your daughter loves her, regardless. It's easy to get caught up in anger/hatred because you see the harm she is causing your daughter, but at the same time, your daughter DOES NOT need to see that from you.

[FrankTheTank55]

Uh uh. I say absolutely not on the phone password. People who have nothing to hide, hide nothing. I'm telling you Frank, I learned the hard way. My daughter was literally an angel, and I trusted her 100%. But she is a child after all, and she is going to make mistakes. It is your job to look out for her, regardless of if she sees it that way. Get involved now.

Yeah, I'm on it!!

[Bouncer]

Just always keep in the back of your mind that despite the "wrong" she is doing, she is still your daughters mother and your daughter loves her, regardless. It's easy to get caught up in anger/hatred because you see the harm she is causing your daughter, but at the same time, your daughter DOES NOT need to see that from you.

THIS!

my mom and dad were always talking shit about each other to me after they got divorced. fucked me up

[dago]

Just always keep in the back of your mind that despite the "wrong" she is doing, she is still your daughters mother and your daughter loves her, regardless. It's easy to get caught up in anger/hatred because you see the harm she is causing your daughter, but at the same time, your daughter DOES NOT need to see that from you.

lol Hatred between us is the understatement of a lifetime..bitch tried to get me arrested for absolutetly nothing last year completely fabricated. When i showed up with counsel and he started questioning her she got spooked and told the truth. She shoulda went to jail for filing a false report. All though I think her boyfriend put her up to it...weak.. :noo: I agree though its even in the order as it stands no parent to speak ill of the other in front of the child and I don't I swear I never say a bad word about her mother in front of her.

[dago]

My daugbhter is already hip to your site as well B lol she calls it the super muscle board..gotta be careful bout that shit too don't need my kid reading your crazy ass :)

[Bouncer]

My daugbhter is already hip to your site as well B lol she calls it the super muscle board..gotta be careful bout that shit too don't need my kid reading your crazy ass :)

i am nothing but a good influence! kids learn to be great by watching me post! :retard::rofl:

[FitnessBrat]

lol Hatred between us is the understatement of a lifetime..bitch tried to get me arrested for absolutetly nothing last year completely fabricated. When i showed up with counsel and he started questioning her she got spooked and told the truth. She shoulda went to jail for filing a false report. All though I think her boyfriend put her up to it...weak.. :noo: I agree though its even in the order as it stands no parent to speak ill of the other in front of the child and I don't I swear I never say a bad word about her mother in front of her.

Trust me, I completely understand. My ex and I have been apart for 4 years and we still can't even communicate for our children's sake (well, WE can, HE can't). It's pathetic. I never thought it would happen, but my daughter finally sees her father for what he is and the part he plays in this mess. He is impossible to deal with. Be the better/bigger person.

[Bouncer]

yea your husband was always a cunt.

[Scrumhalf]

I can't say I have personal experience with this kind of stuff, but education surely is important. Can you teach her about genetics, about how there is more genetic diversity in a small chinpanzee population in West Africa than in all of humankind. There's a fantastic documentary on this topic where a scientist takes cheek swabs of a couple hundred people in a farmers market in Queens and traces their path out of Africa. Pretty amazing results followed- this guy who looked black and thought of himself as black actually had genes that traced out of the Caucasus. The point of course is how inconsequential things like features and color are. Also talk to her about the important contributions of women to humanity - Marie Curie, Rosalind Franklin, etc etc, poets, musicians, etc.

Teach her about meritocracy, about how the only things that should matter in a post racial world are your deeds and your intellect. Teach her about how the injustices of the past- racial discrimination, the Holocaust, all the pointless jihads, crusades and pogroms were such pointless wastes of time and human energy. Teach her about how she should care about the downtrodden everywhere in the world, about how we will never know how many Einsteins die in childhood in third world countries for want of clean water or vaccinations, their potentials unrealized.

Teach her about empathy and to NEVER judge a person superficially. Then explain to her why the lyrics in these songs, misogynistic and racist and pointless, are the antithesis of what we should be aspiring for.

Take her on trips to museums, especially ones where the sins of the past are reexamined. IMO education is far better than anything punitive.

[Turbo3000]

Scrum......good shit.

[blm]

Scrum......good shit.

X10