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  • initiation?!

    k i got a prob with initiating sex... my girl doesn't like it at all when i try it... what she wants is that she initiates it every time, and that i should every time act suprised as if i didn't expect it... cuz that supposedly gets her "going"
    this is what she wrote me in an email: "what gets me going is when I think you're not expecting it at all and then it's kinda like I get to surprise you or something and that makes me feel really good and into it. I know that is weird and I don't want you acting like you never want it cause that would probably be a bad thing too!"
    i think that's bullshit... lately she's been coming up with these rules that just drive me mad... it totally kills the mood, and i don't feel like doing it afterwards...
    it's kind of a 'long dist relationship' so i get to see her once or twice a week... and we maybe have sex like once a week... just last night she told me that i act as if "i expect it every time i see her"... and that doesn't turn her on...
    i mean WFT? hell yeah i expect it... i'd fken do it non stop if it was upto me... but is it too much asking for once a week (or sometimes 2 weeks) ??
    aaargh... she's really sweet, down to earth, simply put the best (and i really mean the best) girlfriend i've ever had... we've been together for 9 months now, and i have never even thought of cheating on her...
    but if this shit continues i don't knwo what to do... sometimes i get really tempted (my ex for example has been calling me the last few weeks begging me to get together and stuff... at the club where i bounce at i get many phone numbers all the time, etc etc)
    i think she's acting this way to "control" the whole sex thing... to make me have sex only when she wants it...
    i read all the time about some of u guys doing it like every day, and i have to dream of doing it like once a week...
    that's not fair... i mean there is other ways of getting it, but at this point i'm still hoping she'll change...
    anyways, just had to vent... i'm really pissed off about it....

  • #2
    Just like she told you what she wants, now it's your turn. She sounds like she likes she likes to be the one in control but that's not gonna work all of the time with you. You'll both have to compromise in order to make things work. Write her an e-mail and tell her how in your perfect world how you'd want things to be, then work on a realistic solution so that you can both be happy. You have to communicate your feelings and desires to her just as she did to you.

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    • #3
      Im just like her I think. When I see my boy, in my mind, he expects it from me automatically, Then when I turn down his advances, he gets pissed off. I like sex, but having it everyother day is way better, because its more intense and pleasureable...and doesnt seem like such a chore. Of course, he gets mad at me, and the biggest problem in our relationship is the lack of sex he gets.

      And yes, write her an email and do not cheat on her!

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      • #4
        Slap her and tell her you're the man. Also, get some on the side bro.

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        • #5
          saw her once this week, and she wanted it, but i told her i was too tired... next week i told her i'll be too busy studying for the exams... and the week after that i'll come up with somehting else...
          i hope that's going to change her mind a bit... i can play her game too...

          and yeah blitz.. i think i'm gonna do that :D

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          • #6
            Originally posted by LORDBLiTZ
            Slap her and tell her you're the man. Also, get some on the side bro.
            :rofl:

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            • #7
              Originally posted by LOCO
              saw her once this week, and she wanted it, but i told her i was too tired... next week i told her i'll be too busy studying for the exams... and the week after that i'll come up with somehting else...
              i hope that's going to change her mind a bit... i can play her game too...

              and yeah blitz.. i think i'm gonna do that :D
              I don't know bro, playing games is too childish to me. Games are fucked in my book. If I knew the person was playing games, I would try to see it early on in the relationship. But in your case, I would side with puddles on that one. Do unto others as you would do unto yourself. I believe in THAT.

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              • #8
                Originally posted by LOCO
                saw her once this week, and she wanted it, but i told her i was too tired... next week i told her i'll be too busy studying for the exams... and the week after that i'll come up with somehting else...
                i hope that's going to change her mind a bit... i can play her game too...

                and yeah blitz.. i think i'm gonna do that :D
                You'll never win that game man. They're like sex camels. They can hold out until we go insane with sperm build up.

                If she can't keep up with you now, it's only going to get worse later on.

                Give her the decency of discussing it, but don;t settle, you'll just be miserable.

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                • #9
                  Originally posted by LOCO
                  saw her once this week, and she wanted it, but i told her i was too tired...
                  :ghey:

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                  • #10
                    [QUOTE]Originally posted by biguglyogre
                    [B]You'll never win that game man. They're like sex camels. They can hold out until we go insane with sperm build up.



                    words to live by
                    :agree:
                    playin the game isn`t gonna solve anything except possibly looseing the girl
                    man talk to her tell her whats going on
                    i lost the woman of my dreams because i didn`t talk to her and shit just kept building up then one day i convinced myself that she wasn`t all that great and i could do better
                    after 6 mos now every day i realize how great she really is

                    just somethin to think about

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                    • #11
                      thanx everyone... we just talked on the phone about it for 2 hours... i just let her know straight out how i feel about it, and how i don't like what she's doing etc... she appologized and said she didn't know she was doing it, and it wasn't on purpose (unconsciously)... she also said she'll change...
                      i'll give her few weeks to see 'the change'...

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                      • #12
                        good man loco

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                        • #13
                          ok it did work :p
                          the past week was awesome... i've had more sex than in the last 3 months together :D hope it stays this way

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