My name is GS, and I'm an Anabolic Freak

[DangerousGround]

good post G-S as always!
bump^^^^^^^

[Bouncer]

Originally posted by drgoodbody
Great post G-S, very insightful and a little unsettling.

I think in part it has to do with whether a person has an "addictive personality" or not. Some people become immersed in things (e.g. BB) to the point of obsession, others can partake in the same thing and enjoy it but never get that level of intensity about it.

Every person makes decisions, either consciously or not, that effect there lives. You chose to do this, you have either consciously or not decided to drop other things, and you ultimately have the ability to change this.

This doesn't mean dumping the gym, AAS, etc... what it means is moderating it and being less obsessed (easy to say, hard to do). Think about it, anything taken to the obsessive level is ultimately self destructive. Dial it back a couple notches bro, and your life will be more balanced and much better.

DrG

I agree and I disagree at the same time. Everything you said is 100% correct but you have to admit, to be the best you have to be obsessed. You can bet on it that all the top pros are obsessed, you can bet that anyone that won a gold medal in the olympics is obsessed. You see what I mean. I realize that I am obsessed with bodybuilding but then again I dont think I could have it any other way. I dont want to be a person that skips a meal because im out with my buddies. There is no way I could become my absolute best if I did that.

[Timma]

Originally posted by THE BOUNCER
I agree and I disagree at the same time. Everything you said is 100% correct but you have to admit, to be the best you have to be obsessed. You can bet on it that all the top pros are obsessed, you can bet that anyone that won a gold medal in the olympics is obsessed. You see what I mean. I realize that I am obsessed with bodybuilding but then again I dont think I could have it any other way. I dont want to be a person that skips a meal because im out with my buddies. There is no way I could become my absolute best if I did that.

I totally agree with that. I feel the same way. Here's what I posted at another board in this thread.

I go through the same things G-S but not to the same degree you do. I don't do aas, but my fitness and workouts have controlled my life. My diet and my always having to go to the gym have alienated me from everyone. I wouldn't say it's totally that, but i'd say 90% of it is. I talk to my family like once a week. I used to see my grandparents every week, but now i'm lucky i see them once a month. I always use the excuse that I have to go to the gym, or I need to eat. I am a very avid golfer and that even gets curbed now. I used to spend every day of my summers on the course. Now i'm lucky if i get out once a week.

I'm always looking at myself in the mirror, not being happy of where i'm at. I have accomplished a huge goal when it comes to bodybuilding. When I started i was 135# 6'2". 3 years later I am at about 182#. I was always the small kid. And still I am cause everyone I know is fat. I still get comments that I am skinny. My goal right now is 220# by next summer. I just want people to look at me and just have their jaws drop. I want to go to my H.S. reunion and have everyone be like, "is that Tim? Holy shit!" It's hard sometimes cause I don't have anyone that's religious to working out like me. I don't have a training partner like the rest of you so my goals are sometimes harder to reach. Wow i've never really told anyone that before.

But i'm happy with what I do have. A house, a g/f and a loving family. And i count my blessings everyday.

[beefcake]

Originally posted by THE BOUNCER
I agree and I disagree at the same time. Everything you said is 100% correct but you have to admit, to be the best you have to be obsessed. You can bet on it that all the top pros are obsessed, you can bet that anyone that won a gold medal in the olympics is obsessed. You see what I mean. I realize that I am obsessed with bodybuilding but then again I dont think I could have it any other way. I dont want to be a person that skips a meal because im out with my buddies. There is no way I could become my absolute best if I did that.

Kind of like what victor martinez says, "When you're not working out, someone out there is, and when you meet them, they will beat you." I think that pretty much sums up training, diet, and social life for the bb. :agree:

[drgoodbody]

Originally posted by THE BOUNCER
I agree and I disagree at the same time. Everything you said is 100% correct but you have to admit, to be the best you have to be obsessed. You can bet on it that all the top pros are obsessed, you can bet that anyone that won a gold medal in the olympics is obsessed. You see what I mean. I realize that I am obsessed with bodybuilding but then again I dont think I could have it any other way. I dont want to be a person that skips a meal because im out with my buddies. There is no way I could become my absolute best if I did that.

I agree with you, but I was assuming (maybe incorrectly) that G-S and most of us on here for that matter, aren't going to be pro's or win a gold medal - so a little moderation in our obsessoin for the sake of some balance in life is probably worth it.

JMO,

DrG

[Bouncer]

Originally posted by drgoodbody
I agree with you, but I was assuming (maybe incorrectly) that G-S and most of us on here for that matter, aren't going to be pro's or win a gold medal - so a little moderation in our obsessoin for the sake of some balance in life is probably worth it.

JMO,

DrG

Yes your right.

[FX4]

Originally posted by drgoodbody
I agree with you, but I was assuming (maybe incorrectly) that G-S and most of us on here for that matter, aren't going to be pro's or win a gold medal - so a little moderation in our obsessoin for the sake of some balance in life is probably worth it.

JMO,

DrG

That is pretty much how I am...I have no desire to work out for competition, so therefore I am not concerned that I am not the biggest person out there, though I do want to be big enough to suit myself. My reasoning behind working out and eating right is for my own gratification and satisfaction with my life. I enjoy too many of the extracurricular activities like Tim mentioned (softball, golf, basketball) to completely give them up, so what I try to do is find a happy medium. I know that I will never look like some of you guys I have seen on here, not because I don't want to but because it would consume too much of my life and with a beautiful wife and two kids that I would go to the ends of this earth for, my physique comes in second to that...now once again, don't get me wrong, I still am very committed to gaining the body I want (my mother swears I am a health freak and always teases me about it, saying she can't eat at my house because everything is "health food" as she puts it) but it is just a little lower on my priority list than some of you, even though I don't take it to the degree of some, I do appreciate the insights and apply much of what I learn here...but as GS said, even though it is a healthy addiction as far as your body is concerned, it is still an addiction no different from drugs or anything of that sort if it causes you to alienate the ones you love, because one day you'll look up and they'll all be gone...just my .02, sorry for the rambling :)

[Bouncer]

Originally posted by FX4
That is pretty much how I am...I have no desire to work out for competition, so therefore I am not concerned that I am not the biggest person out there, though I do want to be big enough to suit myself. My reasoning behind working out and eating right is for my own gratification and satisfaction with my life. I enjoy too many of the extracurricular activities like Tim mentioned (softball, golf, basketball) to completely give them up, so what I try to do is find a happy medium. I know that I will never look like some of you guys I have seen on here, not because I don't want to but because it would consume too much of my life and with a beautiful wife and two kids that I would go to the ends of this earth for, my physique comes in second to that...now once again, don't get me wrong, I still am very committed to gaining the body I want (my mother swears I am a health freak and always teases me about it, saying she can't eat at my house because everything is "health food" as she puts it) but it is just a little lower on my priority list than some of you, even though I don't take it to the degree of some, I do appreciate the insights and apply much of what I learn here...

Thats perfectly fine bro. You do it to feel healthy and look good while still enjoying life and family. I see no problem with that at all. Everyone is different and everyone enjoyes different things.

[Bouncer]

Originally posted by FX4
it causes you to alienate the ones you love, because one day you'll look up and they'll all be gone...

Your right about that pal. I lost my grandfather about 5 months ago. He was a captain of the state police, he got a bronze star in WW2 and I always looked up to him. He was my hero in many ways. We were very close even though we live about 150miles apart and I would only see him on holidays. He was always there for me when I was growing up and I will never forget him. I took it for granted that he would always be there and now he is gone. i have a tear in my eye as I type this to be honest. dont ever take family for granted. I will never forget..

[FX4]

Originally posted by THE BOUNCER
Your right about that pal. I lost my grandfather about 5 months ago. He was a captain of the state police, he got a bronze star in WW2 and I always looked up to him. He was my hero in many ways. We were very close even though we live about 150miles apart and I would only see him on holidays. He was always there for me when I was growing up and I will never forget him. I took it for granted that he would always be there and now he is gone. i have a tear in my eye as I type this to be honest. dont ever take family for granted. I will never forget..

I feel your pain bro....my grandfather was basically my daddy as well because the real piece of shit run off when I was 2 and my grandpa died right before my HS graduation, so I know that hits home with me too

[Bouncer]

Originally posted by FX4
I feel your pain bro....my grandfather was basically my daddy as well because the real piece of shit run off when I was 2 and my grandpa died right before my HS graduation, so I know that hits home with me too

sorry to hear it man..

[beefcake]

I feel i'm on the same boat as you. I don't compete, probably never will, but my training comes first in my book. Everything has taken a back seat to it, even things I enjoy doing. So you're not the only one. Many of us are affected by the lifestyle. Call it being perfectionists maybe? You didn't come out and say "all you guys who aren't, don't have the will and discipline apparently," and it doesn't mean that either. Everyone is different. Personally, I don't consider it a bad thing, it's who I am and i'm glad I am this way.

[FX4]

Originally posted by G-S
To clarify something - I'm just your regular guy, in many ways. I have no desire to step on stage, ever.

The point of the post is that AAS and my body have taken over my life, and everything else takes a backseat. Even my own family, and it doesn't have to be that way.

I'm possessed with being the biggest and strongest guy, no matter where I am at. When I see someone who is bigger/stronger, it drives me to a point of no return.

If I was this obsessed with my career, I'd be a damn millionare by now. :D

I hope this topic didn't put anyone down in the dumps, but I just wanted to see if there were others out there that have let the same things happen to them that I have let happen to me.

Personally GS, I don't think there's anything wrong with the way you are, you just have a burning desire to be the best, which I am the same way and have caught myself before, like putting in too many hours at work and not spending time with my family like I should, which is why I am on marriage #2...I just think its great you have realized what it is doing to your life before it was too late bro :)

[pierced one]

Originally posted by FX4
I just think its great you have realized what it is doing to your life before it was too late bro :)

I agree, by reading all of your posts i have realized that I am starting to go down the same road, not that, it is bad, but i now understand the moderation of it all. These points are very important, health, family and friends. I just need to weigh everything out and proceed with life, in moderation, working hard not to upset the comfortable balance they all have.

[spidey]

I can seriously relate to this. It's like you were describing me! When I started out a few years ago, I did so for a medical reason. I have had shoulder problems and back problems since 1992. My doctor and physical therapist told my that some of the muscles in my back had atrophied and were no longer capable of correctly supporting me. This caused a lot of back pain. My shoulders have a lot of scar tissue inside from chronic inflamation due to tendonitus and they told me that by building up my shoulders, the muscle would help stabilize the joints and take some of the load off the tendons. I weighed 125 lbs my entire adult life at 5'8".

I couldn't get into the gym long enough to make a difference because my damn shoulders would flare up and leave me in pain for 6 weeks at a time. I felt I needed some chemical assistance to build muscle quickly before the pain would force me out of the gym so I did my first cycle. I only wanted 15 or 20 lbs too initially. Then I though I would just settle down; keep up with my diet and cruise along with my workout routine and go back to normal life.

I gained 37 lbs on that first cycle and the added strength made me feel superhuman. All my friends and relatives were awe-struck the first time they saw me afterward. My trapps seemed to pop up out of nowhere and chest looked like it had the Grand Canyon running down the middle; I couldn't believe what I saw in the mirror. The best part? My back pain completely disappeared and my shoulders, while not completely healed, were noticably better.

I do have an addictive personality and I was hooked. LIke you, everything else seemed to take a back seat. I became much less productive at work. Other hobbies just didn't hold my interest anymore. My family life suffered since I spent all my extra money and time on anabolics, supplements, and in the gym.

I have been struggling back from that brink since February. It took a near divorce, fear of a possible legal investigation, and a bad infection to wake me up to what I was allowing to happen. I still am too involved but I'm gradually getting back to normal. I have resumed hobbies like bow-building, fishing and hunting. I make time for my family and I'm slowly getting my work habits back to normal (I still spend way too much time online, LOL).

LIke you, I will stay around to offer advice and MAY (or may not) run another basic cycle or two but I can't let BBing rule my life. Family, friends and career are just more important. I met my original goal of dealing with my back and shoulder problems. I should let it go at that.